Appreciate any form of advice here

Ask a Therapist Seeking Help
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Hello everyone :waving_hand:

I’ve had anxiety issues for as long as I can remember, and I feel like it has gotten worse (my mental health too) as I start growing up…I’m saying this because ever since my late teens, I’ve been experiencing physical symptoms such as disrupted sleep/insomnia, muscle tightness, cold sweat, dry mouth, an impending sense of doom and panic attacks (which is weird because I’ve had significant stressors when younger but never really had these symptoms). I find these physical symptoms really distressing because they basically interfere with how I function daily. I’ve tried many calming techniques but I feel they never really worked for me because the anxious thoughts still remain and if they remain, these physical symptoms will never truly go away.

I’ve tried seeing mental health professionals regarding my anxiety but they keep telling me my anxiety isn’t considered ‘severe’ and all that…how is it not severe if it starts disrupting your sleep and daily functioning? So I’m thinking about seeing a psychiatrist in order to get a proper diagnosis and anxiety medication…but I’m not sure how to go about doing it? I understand I’ll need to head down to a polyclinic and tell the doctor there about my problems, after which they’ll refer me to a psychiatrist.

I’m also quite hesitant on doing it because I’m not physically ill and I’m afraid the doctor will judge me for it (due to past experiences meeting doctors who were dismissive of mental health issues and my anxiety), but well…this is the only way to go about seeing a psychiatrist. Another thing I’m worried about is my parents finding out that I’m seeing one if I do get referred.

What should I do? Should I just think this one through instead of impulsively getting a referral to the psychiatrist? I just want to know if there’s anything genuinely wrong with me

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Hey @nishi, thank you for reaching out! :slight_smile:

I’m really glad you reached out and shared all this here, especially when you’ve already been feeling dismissed by people who were supposed to help…

I’d like to say that whatever you’re describing is not trivial, okay? Disrupted sleep, muscle tension, cold sweats, dry mouth, a persistent sense of doom and panic attacks are real physical symptoms of anxiety! Previous professionals telling you that your anxiety isn’t severe doesn’t mean your experience isn’t valid or that you don’t deserve proper attention :frowning: It could just mean that you have yet to find someone who has taken the full pic seriously! From whatever you have shared, this is really affecting your quality of life and needs attention.

I’m glad you’ve tried calming techniques/seen mental health professionals, but the fact that those haven’t worked warrants more support. Wanting a proper assessment and exploring if meds can help sounds like a reasonable step :slight_smile: You’re right that a polyclinic referral is the typical route to seeing a psychiatrist. You don’t have to be physically ill to go get a referral…mental health concerns are reason enough to get a referral! You can also consider heading down to the emergency room in IMH if you need urgent attention from a psychiatrist.

I hear your fear of being judged and it makes a lot of sense given your past experiences with dismissive doctors…It may help to write down your symptoms and things like when they started, the frequency, and how they affect your day to day life, so you have something concrete to refer to if you feel dismissed in the moment.

As for your parents finding out…this is worth thinking about carefully! If you’re an adult, your medical info is generally your own, though it may help to check the PDPA policies of the hospital you plan to visit. It may be worth thinking about whether you have a trusted adult in your life you could confide in for support through this process!

Your last question…honestly, there is nothing “wrong” with you in the way you might fear! What you’re experiencing really sounds like anxiety that has been undertreated and that deserves proper care. You seeking support shows that you know yourself well enough to recognise that you need more support than you’ve been getting!

If you’d like to speak to someone, you can reach out to National Mindline 1771, okay? You can call them at 1771/whatsapp them at 66691771. They are available 24/7!

You deserve to be heard, and I really hope you get the support you need! :slight_smile:

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Hi @reassuredshiba, thanks so much for taking the time to read my post and giving your advice.

I forgot to add this inside my post but I was actually very close to getting a referral to a psychiatrist / psychologist, but nothing ever came out of it because my mother thinks I’m doing fine (again which I feel is very invalidating) because my insomnia and constant panic attacks went away at some point, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be gone forever…I was a minor at the time and went to see the doctor with my mother so I didn’t really have control over the decision-making process.

I’ve just recently turned into a legal adult, and I’m aware that my parents are no longer my authorized caregivers. This is good news for me because I now have more autonomy in booking medical appointments without them knowing. As for trusted adult, I don’t think my parents would be suitable because they both don’t take mental health seriously. For now, the only person I feel comfortable confiding in about this would be my counsellor from a social service centre…I did tell her I was considering seeking a diagnosis for my anxiety.

I’ll probably head down to the polyclinic sometime this week but another thing I’m worried about is that they won’t see my condition as serious after assessment and then refuse to refer me to a psychiatrist / psychologist…I really hope the doctor will take me seriously this time.

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When a person cares too much about the things around them or the consequences of their recent actions or inaction and you fear being judged, then you’ll be constantly stressed trying to do the right thing. It is much better for you to be detached emotionally to your situations. In short make your decisions and let it be, you can’t be wrong all the time anyway. This is where self-esteem come in. Learn when to care and when to not care a damn. Short of a major disaster, life goes on. Nobody is indispensable, take life one day at a time: Yesterday is past, tomorrow’s tasks just leave it till tomorrow. Laugh at yourself and enjoy today; I have today, who cares about the morrow!

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Hey, thank you for the context, it really helps me understand the full picture! :slight_smile:

Honestly, it makes a lot of sense that you felt powerless back then, esp when you were a minor and the decision wasn’t really yours to make…and the fact that your symptoms eased up for a bit doesn’t mean the underlying anxiety was resolved, and it’s valid to want proper support now!

I think it’s really encouraging that you have your counsellor as someone you can confide in! It might be worth looping her in before your polyclinic visit, as she may be able to help you prep.

On your worry about not being taken seriously at the polyclinic…that concern is understandable, esp given your history. The tip about writing things down still stands! Having a clear, concrete account of your symptoms (what they are, when they started, how often they happen, and how they affect your daily life) can make a real difference in how the consultation goes. It sort of shifts the convo from something that might feel dismissive to something the doctor has to engage with directly. You can also be upfront about the fact that you’ve sought help before and felt your concerns weren’t fully addressed.

Just remember that you don’t need to “prove” a certain level of severity to deserve a referral, okay?

I really hope the visit goes well! :slight_smile: