Hi, yeah. Sometimes I contemplate hanging myself. For context, I’ve recovered from a mental health crisis in 6th grade, it’s been 5 years now. And tbf the mental crisis was more vivid, almost planning but not really bc I vented it all in public(stupid choice, back then ppl called me suicide girl or adjacent, my teacher of that time that i talked about called me a nuisance) but yea i’ve gotten better but it’s not the best, but sometimes it pops out like a notification at times. Most days it’s usually not there. Is this normal? I’m not going to act because I still want to live but the thought is there. Like some suggestion I’ll never take. Usually occurs when I surpress anger but it comes at times.
Hi @approachabledragonfruit4729 thank you for sharing!
I’m really glad to hear that you have recovered from a mental health crisis and that things have gotten better for you! that’s something admirable 
But yeah, what you have shared does sound quite tiring… it’s like having an unwanted pop-up that you didn’t ask for and don’t want appearing from time to time…
Also, what you are describing is actually surprisingly common and normal! Thoughts about self-harm or suicide can occur even in people who are not in crisis and have no intention of acting on them. and the fact that you can observe the thoughts, recognise it as something you won’t act on, and even describe it as “a suggestion I’ll never take” is actually a sign of pretty good self-awareness and psychological distance from it!
To add on, the pattern where you notice about the thoughts occurring when you suppress your anger is something very useful! and I would say this can be something that you might want to work together with a professional if you want to!