recently i keep getting worried and ruminate over things that i had did that might have been mistakes at work (no one has said anything about it yet)
I’m not sure if it was a mistake but definitely I could have handled things better or in another way. And I keep thinking and ruminating about it, trying to justify/ rationalise my thoughts but it always ends up at ‘oh no I think I did something really bad, what will happen to me if someone found out? Will I lose my job? What will the consequences be? What if there are legal consequences?’
I try to reframe and say that people make mistakes all the time and that it was an oversight and a lack of experience yet people are not that kind to always see that as a reason for making a mistake.
I keep thinking about the what ifs over and over again especially at night when I’m preparing to sleep.
I feel like speaking to someone about it might help to clear up my thoughts which are clouded by my anxiety but I’m also scared to do so as what if it was indeed a huge mistake and many things end up happening? What if the person I tell ‘exposes’ me? I don’t even know if what I did was counted as a mistake - I know people usually just let it go and learn but I can’t help to ruminate over it
Hey @dumpling13! Thank you for sharing your feelings with us.
It’s totally okay to make mistakes! Mistakes are part of being human and we learn from them! Nobody’s perfect. These are some tips you could adopt!
- Find some form of distraction
Distraction or keeping your mind occupied with something that you find interesting or motivating can help stop rumination. Your brain only has a limited capacity to information, focusing your attention on pleasant thoughts or activities leaves little room left for rumination. Activities such as singing along to your favourite music or reading a book (for at least 10 minutes) can help break your cycle of thoughts and improve your mood.
When you find you’re starting to ruminate, quickly find a distraction to break your thought cycle.
- Talk with a friend or loved ones
Ruminating thoughts can make you feel isolated. A trusted friend may be able to offer an outside perspective that can help break the cycle. You might also ask them to help you make a list of actions or events that turned out well in the past. This can help you gain perspective.
Be sure to speak with a friend who can give you that perspective rather than ruminate with you.
- Understand your triggers
Each time you find yourself ruminating, make a mental note of the situation you’re in.
This includes:
- where you are
- what time of day it is
- who’s with you (if anyone)
- what you’ve been doing
- any triggers that have kicked off the unwanted thoughts
Being aware of these triggers may help reduce any tendency to ruminate.