Conversing with Parents: To Share or Not to Share?

As a therapist, I have spent countless sessions with children, youths and young adults who struggle with in their relationship with their parents.

One of the more common topics that surfaces during our conversations in therapy are the fact that they dislike how their parents react/respond to them when they share something with their parents. They also end up fearing to share anything that’s unconventional or ‘not normal’ in their parents’ perspectives, leading to a relationship that is distanced and almost isolated.

However, most of them share that they actually DO want their parents to be involved in their lives and they DO want their parents to know about their thoughts and feelings. They just find it difficult to share with parents because of the response they might receive.

I’m curious to know -

  1. What would be a pre-requisite for you, so that you would be willing to share with your parents? E.g. - “My parents must be non-judgemental and promise not to nag”, or “I must have a close relationship with my parents in order for me to share”.

  2. How do you find the balance in sharing information with your parents? Some things can be rather sensitive, or involve risks. What would be some things you can/would share, and some things you would not want to share?

  3. How would you advise someone to overcome their fear of their parents’ response to their sharing? :thinking:

Share with us your thoughts and honest views, I’ll be happy to learn together!

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