Unemployed

Ask a Therapist Is This Normal?
1

I worked at a company for about 3 years, and have left recently due to the job being stagnant with little career progression. I managed to land myself in a job shortly after but realised that was not what I applied for. Hence, I left a few days later.

Was unemployed for 3 weeks, but lucky for me again, I landed myself with another job offer. However, the organisation did not provide me with the relevant training and I was trying my best to learn whatever I could. There was the poor work life balance and I did not feel valued as an employee. Knowing I was unable to stay in this company for long, I voiced out my concerns but was let go by the company instead.

Within these 2 months, I’ve been questioning my self worth and confidence. It does make me feel very negative, and I’ve been feeling stress everyday. To find another job, yet feeling so lost at the same time. I’m afraid of taking the next step, and I feel so alone because everyone I know has a job and I feel very alone in this.

Is this normal…

2

Hi @Vegetable :wave: First of all, I commend your efforts to stand up for yourself and prioritising your own needs. We only have this one life, so we should do what makes us feel valued, fullfilled, and purposeful. Not everyone has your courage! I hope that you continue to put yourself first despite job search being tough, trust that you will find a company that aligns with your professional aspirations in job progression. It will all be worth it. All the best, I believe in you :muscle:

3

Hello @Vegetable

It sound like you are feeling conflicted because you’re going against the mold of being picky in the jobs you’re getting, as well as feelings of worry due to being currently jobless.

While I can’t fully understand the extent of your situation, I would like to commend you for being brave in leaving your job and prioritizing your interests. While a job is there to help you earn finances, it can also be seen as an integral part of your life given you spend most of your time per week on it.

It would definitely be frustrating if you end up needing to grit your teeth and slog through a job, day by day, for months to years.

From what you’ve told me so far, it’s good that you are aware of what you want in a job, and this can aid you in filtering out what is considered a good or bad job to you.

On a personal note, I think that the job market is really bad right now, and favored towards employers rather than employees, so if you frustration with the job market, I would like to reassure you it’s perfectly reasonable.

If you feel frustrated with yourself due to this period of joblessness, I want you to know that I understand, as I personally have been in a place like that before as well. While I will not know the full extent of the pain you’re going through, I can recommend some tips to help you tide through this critical time.

  1. Take up learning courses to brush up skillset. You can try looking into skillsfuture to find cheap courses or subsidies to help boost your career. (Super useful and underrated imo!)
  2. Take up a part time job first to help cope with the financial aspect. Ultimately, the purpose of a job is to earn money. Since a part time job is temporary, you can take one first while simultaneously finding for your ideal full time job.

Right now the job market is stagnant because most people are holding out for their year end bonuses. It would be likely that there are more job openings posted up during the start of the year next year!

I want you to know that you are perfectly valid in feeling alone in feeling jobless and having stresses over it. Even though we can’t fully comprehend the depths of what you’re feeling due to our individual differences in life, I hope that you know you’re not alone in this situation and I hope it gets better for you soon!

I believe that if you bide your time long enough, eventually you’ll find a job that matches what you want!

4

Hi Deniseleest

Thank you for the immense courage in coming forward with what you have experienced for the past two months. Please know that it is completely normal to feel lost and question your self-worth after experiencing job changes, especially when they involve challenges like lack of training, poor work-life balance, and feeling undervalued. Many people go through similar phases in their careers, and it’s important to recognise that your feelings are valid.

I have observed that job transitions and changes can evoke a range of emotions, including anxiety, frustration, and self-doubt. It’s common to feel overwhelmed, especially after multiple transitions in a short period. Many of us tie self-worth to our employment status or job performance. Remember that our value is not solely defined by our job. Feeling alone during this time is understandable, especially when those around us seem settled in their careers. This can increase feelings of inadequacy.

May I suggest these for your consideration:

  • Reframe Your Perspective: Instead of viewing your job changes as failures, consider them as steps toward finding a role that truly fits your skills and values. Each experience contributes to your growth.

  • Focus on Your Strengths: Make a list of your skills, accomplishments, and positive feedback you’ve received in the past. This can help reinforce your confidence and remind you of your capabilities.

  • Set Small, Achievable Goals:Break down the job search process into manageable tasks (e.g., updating your resume, networking with friends, applying for a certain number of jobs per week). Celebrate small victories to build momentum.

  • Network and Seek Support:Reach out to friends, former colleagues, or professional networks for support and advice. Connecting with others can provide encouragement and open up new opportunities.

  • Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, hobbies, or mindfulness practices. Taking care of your mental health is crucial during this time.

  • Consider Professional Help: If feelings of stress and negativity persist, talking to a career coach or therapist can provide guidance and support tailored to your situation.

Keep looking forward and consider to:

  • Explore New Opportunities: Keep an open mind about potential job roles that may not fit your previous expectations but could lead to fulfilling experiences.

  • Invest in Learning: Consider taking online courses or attending workshops related to your field of interest. This can enhance your skills and boost your confidence.

  • Stay Positive and Persistent: Job searching can take time. Stay positive, keep applying, and remember that finding the right fit is worth the effort.

  • Reflect on Your Values: Think about what you truly want in a job (e.g., company culture, work-life balance, growth opportunities) and use these criteria to guide your search.

It’s important to remember that you’re not alone in this journey; many people face similar challenges when navigating their careers. By focusing on self-care, seeking support, and maintaining a positive outlook, you’ll be better equipped to find a role that aligns with your goals and values. Give yourself grace during this transitional period—it’s a stepping stone towards a more fulfilling career path. Keep going! :heart:

5

Dear @Vegetable,

Thank you for reaching out to us. It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed and discouraged after going through such challenging situations. It’s important to remember that many people go through similar experiences, and it’s okay to feel lost and uncertain about the future.

It’s a tough time, but please know that you’re not alone in this. Taking the next step might seem daunting, but it’s okay to take some time to focus on yourself and regain your confidence. Remember that your worth is not defined by your job, and things will get better. If you ever need to talk or need support, I’m here for you.