Are these normal?

Is it normal to have random high levels of anxiety caused by the most minute of problems? recently i had a few episodes of anxiety that has been increasingly been hard to cope. is this normal?

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first of all, what’s normal?

there are 8 billion people.
hence 8 billion different brains.

what’s normal to me might not be normal to you and vice versa.

would you like to share about what’s causing you this anxiety?

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Sure! I will give you an example that happen a few days ago… i was at a gathering and the host who is my close friend acted sort of cold i freaked and spiralled thinking that i did something of course i did not…

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How did you react after you realised your close friend acted cold? I think it’s kinda normal to feel anxious but if it’s affecting your usual functioning then maybe you’ll need to seek some professional help. Does this happen all the time?

Hi @Hiiamthomas1,

Thank you for coming on here and sharing about your struggles with anxiety and how it’s affecting you. I wanna let you know that what you’re thinking and feeling is valid given your circumstances and we can explore further on this together. :slightly_smiling_face:

First off, anxiety serves the purpose to keep us safe from threats by worrying about it (prevent the likelihood of it happening, engage in behaviours to avoid, etc.) or fearing for your safety (from real or perceived danger). So in that sense, it’s normal to feel anxious about certain things, events or people that make us uncomfortable until it stops being helpful (in your experience: random high levels…most minute of problems…spiralled thinking did something i did not…). :pensive:

I wonder when did this start for you? If you’re keeping a look out (intentionally or unintentionally) about anxiety-provoking events/things - what is it trying to help with? Is there a need not being met or something got taken away from you? Did something happen recently? How did you use to cope in the past that help you calm down, even for the slightest bit?

Now let’s look at your example with your friend. It sounds like you didn’t do anything in particular (you did checked for evidence) but your mind jumped to a thought (which i wonder: “You were… and that made your close friend act cold to you!” and that probably went on and on) that led to a change in your behaviour and feelings (freaking out) - so while it’s possible you could’ve made him act cold but what was the probability (or likelihood) of that exactly? Perhaps this is where you can be kinder to yourself, and consider shifting (to a more helpful) perspective?

In the meantime, when things get overwhelming again, perhaps you can try this exercise in a comfortable and safe space as it helps to refocus on the present moment by shifting focus away from anxious feelings. And with practice, you can start noticing when the anxiety builds in you and try to cope better. Let us know what you think about this? Hope to hear from you so until then, take care! :slightly_smiling_face:

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have you heard of occam’s razor?

basically it means that if you have two different ideas to explain the same phenomenon, you should choose the simpler one.

your friend could be tired or preoccupied with being a host etc.

the point is not to think too highly of ourselves to think that the world revolves around us.

99.9% of the time, people are busy thinking about themselves to think about others.

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I do have these often this started 2 years ago i am not in anyway self centred or think the world revolves around me but i think that everything wrong that happens could have been my fault. I used to be a happy go lucky guy but 2 year ago eveyday has been miserable as my thoughts are plagued with self doupt and worry

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Hi @Hiiamthomas1

I think it’s normal and natural for everyone to experience some levels of anxiety but if it starts affecting you and your ability to function then you might want to explore more ways and methods to control the anxiety.

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@Hiiamthomas1

To add on also you might want to explore therapy and try not to rely and take medication because I feel talk therapy would good and helpful for you especially cause you said that you’ve thoughts of self doubt and worry and therapy can help you in reframing your thoughts and gaining skills to manage the anxiety.

Therapy is hard work, you won’t magically and instantly feel better, it takes time and effort and I wish you well. Take care.

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well, thinking that we could be the source of all problems is also one way of thinking that we are all-important, isn’t it? :slight_smile:

im curious, when you said this selfdoubt started two years ago, would you happen to be now in your adolescence?

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I am in my later years of adolescence

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maybe the next time you feel anxious, look around to see if you can be of help to the people around you or do something to distract yourself.

just focus on getting 1% better each time.