hello im having some issues and i would like to know more about it and whether it’s normal??
stress + im easily irritated and angered. even by the smallest things.
not sure what this issue it but i find it so challenging to interact with people to the point i cant order my own food, cant buy something on my own. especially for presentations, my heart rate would go up, i’ll have cold sweat, shakiness, stomachache that sometimes require me to go to the toilet… im highly dependent on my parents and friends as i often can’t speak for myself.
maybe this issue is related to my fear of darkness…i can’t sleep in the dark + when i go to the cinema, i would experience fast heart rate, stomachache, some weird feeling in my chest, and shakiness as well. it makes me want to panic. and if i ate, then i’d feel like vomiting. and its even worse because i have a fear of vomiting in public…
i have sleeping issues?? my sleep schedule is messed up. i would go to sleep at 2 am and wake up at 8 am for school. i usually wake up almost every hour. i used to have sleep paralysis on a daily basis (it reduced. but im still having it) together with hallucinations i think as i’d see some creepy ghostly figures around my house. i feel sleepy doing normal things like playing piano or eating. i feel so tired everyday but i cant fall asleep at night.
im not sure whats this issue, sometimes when im eating in public, i would suddenly experience a fast heart rate + shakiness + stomachache + cold sweat + occasionally feel like vomiting which i mentioned above i have a fear of vomiting. when i feel like vomiting, it would make the situation worse, like an even faster heart rate etc.
i think im incapable of comprehending the emotions of others. when they talk to me about their feelings i cant seem to care and even if i try to, i cant understand them. i think i’d only understand it if i experience the same issues as them but i still wont sympathise with them. im not sure what this is, it makes communicating with others really difficult as i really cannot understand their emotions and perspective. i often just say what i know they want to hear, not because i want to say it.
thank you for taking your time to read this, i dont know if there’s anything wrong with me. please enlighten me
Hey @anoni, welcome to the forum and thanks for sharing your story! You seem to be dealing with a lot but it looks like there are some common symptoms like fast heart rate, cold sweat etc. The professionals would have a better explanation for these so I wanna touch on point 6 instead.
I think this is normal. I face the same issue as well. Some people would call this a lack of empathy but it seems about right to me that you’d only be able to truly emphasize with someone if you have experience the same issue as them. You can’t possibly emphasize with every one. I think it’s also okay to be honest with the people that you’re speaking with. Don’t need to fake it like you understand them - we should be able to all agree that everyone experiences life differently. Just be a kind person, say what you mean and mean what you say.
hello!! yes i’ve been referred to as someone who lacks empathy and compassion T.T but thank you so much for your input. i really appreciate it!
Thanks for having the courage to open up about your struggles here with us. It sounds like your anxiety gets distressing to the point where you need to rely on others in social/ public interactions. It also sounds like you’re having difficulties understanding from others’ perspectives; as well as with your sleep and eating being dysregulated, I can see how your mood (irritable, fearful, tired) can be affected badly - this is valid given your situation…
I wanna commend you on your self-awareness too where you’re trying to see if your experience is driven by your fear of darkness - and that’s something worth exploring further. Additionally, I wonder if your thoughts, feelings and bodily reactions work interrelatedly in a cycle that keeps your anxiety going - like it starts with (not entirely accurate) thoughts about how you’ll be seen by others in public, which spikes in your body as “fast heart rate + shakiness + stomachache + cold sweat + occasionally feel like vomiting” that makes you want to reduce the sensations so you avoid the situation that slowly becomes a default setting and reinforces not wanting to go through it and strengthens the beliefs/urges regarding your social fears.
Of course, there’s definitely more to this that I believe requires more sharing which I think will be helpful in a non-judgmental setting with professionals that make you feel safe to work through the cycle (that could mean facing the situations gradually to see that some of your initial thoughts could be less than accurate and that you can survive ordering food, eating in public, etc. which will also improve your overall mood:
- Samaritans of Singapore (1-767)
- Family Service Centres
- James Cook University Clinic
- NIE Wellness Centre
- NUS Clinical & Health Psychology Centre
In the meantime, you can support yourself with the anxiety by increasing your ability to handle distress - some of the ways to help calm your mind and body are through:
Hope this helps you a bit for the moment and hope to hear more from you. Remember that you deserve and can get the support you need. Take care!
hi there! thank you for taking the time to read what i’ve written down, i appreciate it
and thank you for the suggestions to handle distress!
as for this, “fast heart rate + shakiness + stomachache + cold sweat + occasionally feel like vomiting”
i would definitely experience this if i had to do a presentation, which i understand its due to my fear of doing so.
i also experience this in the cinema, probably due to my fear of darkness, along with my anticipation and expectation that this would happen.
occasionally when i’m eating outside, i actually do not have any thoughts. most of the time i’ll just be conversing with whoever i’m with, and these feelings would just kick in all of a sudden.
Hi @anoni. It sounds like you may be experiencing symptoms of anxiety in specific situations, such as presentations or being in the cinema. It’s not uncommon for anxiety to manifest physically with symptoms like a fast heart rate, shakiness, stomachache, cold sweat, and the feeling of nausea. These reactions may be linked to specific fears or triggers, such as fear of public speaking or darkness. If these symptoms are significantly impacting your daily life or causing distress, it might be helpful to consider seeking support from a mental health professional. They can provide strategies to manage anxiety, help identify triggers, and work towards reducing the intensity of these physical reactions. Remember, you’re not alone in dealing with anxiety, and support is available to help you navigate these challenges. Take care,