Fall from grace

This has been affecting me so much mentally recently…I used to be super athletic and active since kindergarten to secondary school. I was bullied for my weight in secondary school which led me to be more active in the gym and sports (for a year). Ever since then, somehow I lost motivation completely and grown super conscious about my body shape, a lumpy belly and man breasts… Everytime i buy clothes, the contours of my lumpiness makes me feel even more terribly. Somehow I cannot muster up the discipline and motivation to bring myself to overcome this, especially with an impending NS looming. Seeing how I used to be in such good shape and now, a deteriorated mess doesn’t help. Furthermore, I even have a gym in my house but yet I’m even more pressed that I cannot get back on my feet even when the solution is just a couple meters away…

I don’t know what to do, I’m so done with myself…


Hello @Kopi thank you for sharing ! What have you tried recently to get yourself to excersise ?

Usually I feel removing obsticles for my self such as packing excersise clothes in my bag or packing my clothes the night before helps too! What are your usual obsticles preventing you from heading out for an excersise ?

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That’s a very interesting way to do it! A little issue is that I have gym equipment 2m away from me and I tried removing these ‘obstacles’ by actively buying more equipment to make my workout experience smoother (but after buying somehow it still doesn’t seem to flick the switch inside my mind)


Hi @Kopi

Thanks for sharing with us your struggles, I hear you… I can see that you’re going through a really difficult time, and I want you to know that it’s completely okay to feel overwhelmed by these feelings. Bullying can have long-lasting effects on our self-esteem and body image, and it’s understandable that you’re struggling to find motivation and discipline to overcome these challenges, especially with the looming pressure of impending responsibilities like NS.

It’s important to be gentle with yourself and to know that it’s okay to not feel okay sometimes. Building motivation and discipline takes time, and it’s okay to take small steps towards your goals, even if it feels like progress is slow. The most important thing is to be consistent.

Here are a couple of suggestions that might help:

  1. Focus on Small Wins :slight_smile: Instead of trying to tackle everything at once, try setting small, achievable goals for yourself! This could be something as simple as committing to going for a short 15 min walk every day or doing a quick workout session in your home gym. Celebrating these small victories can help boost your confidence and motivation over time.

  2. Seek Support! Please know that you don’t have to go through this alone. Please do consider reaching out to a trusted friend, family member, or counselor who can provide you with support and encouragement. They can offer a listening ear, provide helpful advice, and help you stay accountable to your goals :slight_smile: You can even get them to accompany you on your exercise trips to help you stay consistent too!

Remember that your worth is not defined by your physical appearance or past experiences.

Everyone deserves to feel happy and confident in their own skin, and it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. Take things one step at a time, and be kind to yourself throughout the process. We’re here for you too! Let us know how it goes? Hear from you soon.


Ooo hmm I read somewhere before you can try slowly building the habit again step by step. For eg try picking up the weights and do some excersise for a min then put it down, then progressively increase the duration everyday heh

You can try recording down your work out too and put a checklist ! Best is to do it with a friend or you can record it down here haha :muscle: Lemme know if you want some simple excersises heh

Alternatively smol steps like taking the stairs, intentionally walking the longer route helps too. The key is to build the habit and take it step by step :otter:

But yes like what @cottonsoul mentioned dont be too hard on yourself and take your time :slight_smile: even in army they will progressively train you up so not to worry too much you will be just fine heh

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How’s your diet @Kopi ? There’s a saying, you can’t outrun a bad diet so if you’re eating poorly then having a gym at home won’t help much anyway.

Maybe even before exercising, you can try a few things to see if it works.

  1. eat healthier - less sugar, more protein
  2. find an accountability buddy - if you can’t find one, you can just share your progress here!!
  3. walk more - instead of making a special effort to exercise, just make your life a little more active. Take the stairs once a day or walk 1 bus stop to school / work. Every step counts.

We’re rooting for you!! :coffee:

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