I feel depress and helpless

Ask a Therapist Is This Normal?
1

Hi… I feel lost, depress, helpless because

  1. I change job due to mentally drained working in hospital and thought my life will be better. No one will understand me why I change a job because I need a change after 8 years due to unable to align with customer.

  2. I also changing house and that affects me too because I have been getting loan to help with our expenditure and by changing new job help me alot to pay many things.

  3. However during my new workplace where I need to travel. I got scammed in KL with my guest counterpart from Dubai. We got scammed due to passerby approach us and bring us to gangster territory and we have to pay 4k ringgit. It traumatised me due to that event as it is my first time coming to KL.

  4. Due to the event, i unable to fulfill my job well. As such when I come back from work 2 days later, I was told that I’m not performing well and they need to find a new manager to lead the team. Which I agree because the culture doesn’t fit me well…

  5. I was jobless for 3 weeks and luckily I get to work at my previous company but this time in other hospital. The setback that I have the salary is 2 weeks by 2 weeks which I have problem paying for end month need to pay the loan.

  6. I trying to be honest with my wife but it slapped back to me and my wife want a divorce because I have so much debt around 25k. If I never lose my job,I don’t think I will be in this trouble because I able to pay my loan for few months left. Now I feel loss, depression and helpless… I love my wife and my son and I don’t want to get divorce.

I wanted her to give me chance to get back up and I trying to seek counselling to pay my debt faster and better honest with her.

So am I in depression mode?

2

Hi @Losingthestar

Thank you for sharing your experiences and I’m sad to hear that you’re going through this tough time. It sounds like you’ve faced a series of challenging events, from changing jobs to being scammed, and now dealing with financial struggles and relationship issues.

Firstly, please know that you’re not alone, and it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Your feelings of loss and helplessness are valid.

It’s essential to recognize that you’re facing a perfect storm of stressors, including:

  1. Job change and adjustment: It’s normal to feel uncertain or struggle to adapt to a new work environment.
  2. Traumatic event: Being scammed and traumatized in a new city can have a significant impact on your mental health.
  3. Financial stress: Managing debt and financial uncertainty can be a significant source of anxiety.
  4. Relationship issues: Dealing with the possibility of divorce and the impact on your family can be emotionally draining.

Regarding your question about being in depression mode, it’s possible that you might be experiencing some symptoms of depression, such as:

  • Feeling hopeless or helpless
  • Loss of interest in activities
  • Changes in appetite or sleep patterns
  • Difficulty concentrating or making decisions

However, only a qualified mental health professional can provide a proper diagnosis and guidance.

Consider seeking help from a therapist or counsellor who can help you:

  1. Process your emotions: Deal with the trauma, stress, and anxiety you’ve experienced.
  2. Develop coping strategies: Learn effective ways to manage your stress, anxiety, and financial concerns.
  3. Improve communication: Work on communicating more effectively with your wife, including being more open and honest about your financial situation.
  4. Create a plan: Develop a plan to tackle your debt, improve your financial stability, and work towards rebuilding your relationship.

Remember, you don’t have to face this alone. Reach out for help, and take the first step towards healing and recovery. Please know over time and you taking small daily actions, you can achieve a better quality of life. :heart:

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