I feel hopeless and useless

Ask a Therapist Seeking Help
1

Hi, i hardly to stop feeling so sad and cried a lot.Been working so hard at office and continue my daily routine as mom and wife after work.
Recently I involved with retrenchment exercise to some workers, being scolded and received a lot of angry calls.Drained my energy and triggered my anxiety.While coping with this emotion,my daily routine as wife is affected my relationship with my husband.I feel hopeless and alone.

1 Like
2

Hey @JustMe2 thank you for sharing :slight_smile: from what you shared I can tell things have been just piling up for you so I can only imagine how overwhelming it must feel now :people_hugging:

Have you spoken to your husband or friends regarding this and what do you usually do to recharge from these situations ?

Regardless feel free to share more and rant out here we are here to listen :blush:

2 Likes
3

Hello there @JustMe2,

Thanks for coming on and sharing about your struggles with work (it does not sound easy at all) and how you’re finding it really hard to cope. It also sounds like you’re finding the situation pretty bleak (things don’t look like they’re gonna get better if nothing changes) given how tired and overwhelmed you feel - I wanna let you know that your feelings are valid given your circumstances. :people_hugging:

It sounds like you’re pouring from an empty cup (dealing with angry employees, having to take care of the household when you return home, etc.) - you can’t give anymore until you go back to taking care of yourself. You need a breather - catching your breath and continuing to remain above water by taking deep breaths when the going gets tougher (as this helps to calm down your brain’s fight-or-flight response) in the short-term. Also, supporting your physical health is also equally important as working on your mental health - do ensure you’re getting regular exercise, healthy meals, staying hydrated, restful sleep, relaxing activity, practice gratitude and staying connected with others.

I also wonder if you’ve experienced something like this before and what helped you cope better in the past? I also hear how demoralising this must feel and that it’s also affecting your relationship. It will be helpful if you can express this feelings and concerns with someone who can listen and support you - I wonder if you had the chance to share this with your husband? However, if you’re open to seeking professional support to develop better coping skills to regulate your mood and work on your situation, you can consider reaching out to Family Service Centres.

It will also be tough to put work and life on pause so I wonder if you can consider delegating some of the work in office and at home? Here’s where open communication and using I statements: I think/feel … because… and I would prefer that (what you would like done instead) can help you get your concerns across and in a manner that others (i.e., your boss and your husband) can listen in a non-judgmental way and understand clearly, before negotiating for a win-win scenario. This will not be a one-off discussion but it will definitely help in the long run. :slightly_smiling_face:

I can see why you’re feeling on your own in handling this and I hope you can try to work something out to get some help. And once you’re a bit more able to deal with the stress and anxious feelings, you can bounce back stronger and tackle the work - hopefully by being kinder on yourself and coping before it becomes too overwhelming for you again. Hope to hear from you; you deserve and can get the necessary support you need, take care! :slightly_smiling_face:

2 Likes
4

Thank you for your kind advise.Spoken with him and end up fighting.:weary:

1 Like
5

Thank you for your kind advise.Im having racing thoughts and cant stop crying yesterday.Taken xanax and feel better.

2 Likes
6

Thanks for sharing @JustMe2, I’m sure it’s not easy juggling work and family commitments as a working mum. Have you tried setting some boundaries at work? It sounds like a difficult period at work because of the retrenchment exercise but all the more you need to set some limits for yourself.

Like @BKT said, you cannot pour from an empty cup. Maybe take this weekend to recuperate and turn off your (work) phone for a while to reconnect with your family?

1 Like
7

Thank you for your kind advise.Yeah…will do! Feel better after sharing with you guys.Thanks a lot!!

1 Like