I feel like I am a bad person

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I sometimes don’t think before I act, and this really affects me as I feel like what I do offends and hurts people emotionally, and sometimes it does. I hate it when that happens and when I accidentally hurt someone, plus I am not a very empathetic person, so i usually cannot think beforehand, and i just blurt out words and regret them a few moments later, followed by an entire day ruined by this. I am increasingly anxious and I feel like I am a bad person, and I am not worthy to be friends with anybody. This has led to increased dislike on myself and my personality, its making me feel sadder and sadder, and also made me lose my faith in humanity since I feel like everyone is the same as me, and when I need help nobody helps me, and I try to help everyone. Please help!

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Hi Yuanyuan

Thank you for being transparent and open about your struggles. It takes a huge dose of courage to achieve the self awareness you are displaying when you shared your innermost fears, feelings and observations on the areas affecting you. The uncertainty is understandable and your desire to be a better version of yourself is the first step, so well done! Here are some suggestions for your consideration.

  1. Mindfulness and self-reflection: Practice thinking before acting. Take a pause, breathe, and consider the impact of your words.

  2. Empathy development: Engage in active listening, ask open-ended questions, and try to understand others’ perspectives.

  3. Self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness, understanding, and patience. Acknowledge your imperfections and growth potential.

  4. Anxiety management: Explore stress-reducing techniques like meditation, deep breathing, or exercise.

  5. Seek support: Share your concerns with trusted friends, family, or a therapist. They can offer guidance and encouragement.

  6. Challenge negative thoughts: Reframe self-criticism by focusing on positive qualities and accomplishments.

  7. Gradual progress: Celebrate small victories, and don’t expect immediate change.

Remember, personal growth takes time, effort, and support. You are not alone, and your struggles don’t define your worth. Keep taking small steps and I believe the improvements will shine through. Keep going♥️!

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Hi CaringBee
I am also struggling with meeting deadlines with my exams and with an end of year exam coming up in 3 weeks I am super overwhelmed, I took a stress online test and i have severe stress, I can cope but its starting to overwhelm me, and i still worry about this stuff all night and i sleep at 12.30 and only get about 6 hours of sleep I am so tired and so done and so angry PLUS somebody from my class is also getting on my nerves quite a bit

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Hi Yuanyuan,

I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through a tough time. It sounds like you’ve been struggling with some self-doubt and feeling like you might unintentionally hurt those around you. It takes a great deal of courage to acknowledge these feelings, and I want to commend you for reaching out for help.

I think that recognizing these challenges is an important first step towards making positive changes. You’re not alone, and it’s okay to feel this way. It’s important to remember that everyone makes mistakes, and it’s possible to learn and grow from them. Taking time to reflect on your actions and seeking support from others can be valuable. I truly believe that you are worthy of meaningful and supportive relationships. If you’d like, we can explore strategies together to help you navigate these difficult feelings.

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Hi HanSolo2000
Thank you so much for replying, it gives me a sense that someone out there cares about my problems, it makes me feel a little better

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No worries! Always happy to lend a listening ear :slight_smile:

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Hi Yuanyuan

Thank you for sharing what you are currently facing. You feeling overwhelmed and highly stressed is fully understandable given that the major exams three weeks away. Most of us also dread exams, so don’t feel alone.

Here are some suggestions to help you:

  1. Create a study schedule: Break down your study material into manageable chunks, and allocate specific times for each topic.

  2. Prioritize self-care: Ensure you’re getting enough sleep (aim for 7-8 hours), eating nutritious food, and exercising regularly.

  3. Time management: Use tools like the Pomodoro Technique (25 minutes of study + 5 minutes of break) to stay focused.

  4. Seek support: Talk to friends, family, or a school counsellor about your stress and frustrations.

  5. Take breaks: Engage in relaxing activities, like reading, listening to music, or taking a walk.

  6. Address the classmate issue: I can understand how distracting your uneasiness with this classmate can be. Reduce interactions where possible and concentrate your attention and energy on the priorities you have that are facing you. Choose to pay less attention to this person. When thoughts about this classmate arise, there is no need to fight these thoughts or ruminate. Let that thought remain in the background and stay focused on your priorities.

  7. Reframe negative thoughts: Focus on positive affirmations, like “I can handle this” or “I’m preparing well.”

  8. Seek help if needed: Consider a tutor, or approach your teacher for additional consults. Study groups are another avenue you can approach for extra support, if possible.

Remember, you’re not alone, and many students face similar challenges. Take it one step at a time, and don’t hesitate to reach out for help.:heart: