i feel like i'm going crazy

i don’t know what to do anymore, each year i get older i feel less and less in control of my life and myself

i recently went to go do some tests for adhd and also talked about the possibility of depression and anxiety. i’ve gotten none of these diagnosed and tried to bring talk about my mental health to my parents multiple times but i just keep getting shut down with claims that they are listening to me but feel that all these “mental problems” are just things i should grow up learn to get over as well as take vitamins to “cure”.

they’re letting me go forward with the adhd test but i feel so guilty after hearing whatever they said to me and what they thought. i just feel that they’ll look at me differently if i actually got diagnosed with these issues that i legitimately am struggling with. that and the costs for assessments are no joke…

i feel like i’m losing my grip on reality and i don’t even know if anything i do matters anymore. am i just overthinking or am i just heavily derealising…? i feel so anxious and hopeless

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Hi @plvto

Firstly, thank you for sharing with us your struggles on this platform. I hear how challenging and overwhelming this situation is for you, and I commend you for sharing. It takes a lot of strength to open up about your struggles, and I want to acknowledge your courage in seeking help and pursuing the ADHD test despite the obstacles you’re facing.

I can imagine how concerning it feels when your worries about mental health are not being fully understood or supported by your parents. I just want to encourage you that seeking help and getting a diagnosis is a great step toward understanding yourself better and finding the right support. It’s not a reflection of weakness but a proactive approach to improving your well-being.

Your feelings of guilt and worry about how your parents might perceive you after a potential diagnosis are valid, and it’s actually pretty common for individuals to experience such worries. It might be helpful to have an open and honest conversation with your parents about your feelings and concerns, emphasizing the importance of their support during this process. If you find it difficult to start the conversation, you can try out this tool which can help you prepare for the conversation.

As for the anxiety and feelings of losing grip on reality, I hear you and I feel that it’s important that you consider reaching out to a mental health professional who can provide guidance and support. They can help you explore your feelings, develop coping strategies, and process through these challenging times. It will be helpful if you can reach out to any of the professionals from a nearby Family Service Centre, or any school counsellor who may be accessible for you. If not, you can also try these online options to start:

I can also understand that it might feel overwhelming sometimes, so please do keep these numbers and contact them in case of emergency or in case you find yourself in crisis:

Remember that you are not alone in this, your feelings do matter, and there are people willing to help you through this journey. Please let us know how you’re doing and if you’ve managed to reach out to anyone.

Hear from you soon.