Not wanting to live as human

Before you read this, I would like to mention that this does go pretty deep, so if you don’t wish to view/ read such content, please don’t. Enjoy your day though!

Till this day I still HATE living (specifically) as a human being. The purpose of living as a human is vague and differs for sure, but at the end of the day the actions of a human never contribute to earth in a way like (quite literally) every other living organism that has or had walked on the very same ground we do today.* To me, I love the very concept of life and living in general, the sheer complexity needed for an organism no matter the size to even exist is something I am completely facinated by. From things like food chains to survival instincts differing from animal to animal, saying that I am completely blown away by the fact that earth had such a big stroke of luck that such things like this can bloom and thrive is a MASSIVE understatement. Which brings us to the duality of humanity and every other living creature. While many apex predators of the world have natural limits that prevent them from being too powerful, that can’t be said about humanity. Humanity is way too smart, way too powerful, speaking in terms of playing a pvp game (between animals and humans), it would be as if us humans were quite literally hacking. We completely tip the scales of what’s “normal” in this world, and (for the most part and the foreseeable future imo,) we don’t use our ability to help the very place that birthed us; earth.**

    • One could always argue that my passion for the planet could be used as motivation to further my studies and one day solve issues that us humans face today (global warming, extinction of animals etc. Etc.), I personally do not see a future where this is something that can be (fully) achieved. Between the differences between countries, people’s needs, personalities, EVERYTHING that makes a human special is a double edged sword when it comes to solving issues like this. The forever net positive and increasing human population does not help, and as dark as this sounds, I don’t believe that humanity will be able to resolve much of the big threats before we ourselves go extinct from them. (Especially with the points mentioned above, + so many more points that I won’t state)

** - You could always say that a being that is natrually smarter will always aim higher, further than what we see the other animals do. But our impact on this planet due to such ambition has caused near irreversible (at this point) damage that (like I mentioned before,) I don’t believe we can solve/ reverse in time.

In a nutshell,
I really don’t think humans should have existed.
I am completely ashamed of being human,
And I, a human myself, hate humanity. Something that I can never admit of speak of openly due to fear.

… Thank you for reading?

Hey there @Livia,

Thanks for coming on and sharing about your struggles with this pretty existential take on humanity, what it means to be human in that context, and how you truly feel about it…I wanna commend you on having the self-awareness and insight to come up with your views. Plus, this forum definitely and can be a place to discuss such relevant content - this can be a place for open discourse.

First off, I’m curious when did you start having these deep thoughts and going through with these feelings? Also, strong feelings tend to carry a message indicating something unmet or had been taken away from you. If you were to explore and look behind your disdain for humanity, what other beliefs are surfacing for you or what is it trying to tell you about yourself? :thinking:

You made an interesting point regarding the duality of hating humanity’s impact on the world and fascinated by how humanity came to be based on having the right conditions. To me, that says one can despise humanity yet be ok or even be impressed with aspects of being a human such as valuing achievement, striving for knowledge, having empathy regarding all creatures, etc. What do you think are your other values? Perhaps you can note them down and give them some thought? I find that values can kinda be a guide to help us navigate life that is true to who we ARE and want to BE, despite what’s going on around us.

While you tackle these big think topics, hopefully with some input from the community, do allow me to share some exercises, that if you’re up for it, can try to help with any distressing feelings from overwhelming you.
• Being mindful of the present moment
• Being kind to yourself in the face of the harsh reality

I’m also curious to hear more from you as I think that there’s definitely more that we can learn from each other in a supportive manner. Do know that you deserve and can get the necessary support you need. Until then, take care! :slightly_smiling_face:

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tbh like we all just want to escape reality cos especially when ur week is piled even on the weekends but like u just want to continue but yet at the same time u just want to escape so…

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You know the Show Young Sheldon.

He is a man of science so to speak and his mom is a woman of faith.
But when his mom breaks down he said something that reaffirms life.

If the gravity of the universe was just 1% Stronger, everything would collapse and it was just 1% Weaker, everything would drift away.
Which means there is a Divine Force that created the universe ( Be whatever your religious persuasion )

Personally I would rather be a cat and meow all day. But Who are we to question why the way things are - In this case being Human when that was predetermined by a Divine Force ?

The right question to ask is what is my role in this universe. Yeah it sucks huh that we cant choose what creature we want to be, our race, our family, our social stature etc. But making the most of what IS and how we move ahead is what is really needed.

Like John Lenon said = Love is the Answer , What was the question ?

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