previously i have mentioned that I had a fight with my classmates. Sadly this issue has persisted and because of it Im facing problems at school. Our form teachers are getting involved, some parents have been complaining about me. Everything is just so stressful for me because I have to go through this alone. I have no friends and I cant open up to my family because im scared theyll judge me. Right now, I want to run away from my problems. I dread going to school everyday. I want to take time off school, have some time to myself. So that I can focus on myself and calm myself down. But at the same time, I dont want to sacrifice my studies just because of this. Ive been “skipping” school alot lately because of this as well. But its not easy as I will miss out a lot in class. I dont want to give up my studies just because of this minor setback but it has been affecting me a lot and Im not in the right state of mind rn. In addition to that, I cant sleep at night, my mind is a mess, I tend to cope by stress eating or starving myself. I feel like I want to seek help. But as a teen with a judgmental family, Im scared to approach anyone or talk to anyone about this. Please tell me what can I do from here.
Hello! That sounds really tough and I appreciate that you are willing to share and seek advice 
. Although I am not a professional, I just want to affirm your efforts that you are extremely brave and tenacious to deal with your friendship problems! I hear that you are afraid to open to up to your family about it, but is there some other trusted adult that you can turn to? For example, your form teachers, counsellors or, if you are willing to try, you can seek help from medical professionals online through helplines ! You are really strong and brave for going through this. Know that there are people cheering u on!
Dear Anonymous323,
Thank you for reaching out to us in your time of need. We are thankful that you chose to share with us a little about what you are grappling with in school. Going through tough times is one thing, going through them by ourselves is quite a different thing altogether. Know that you are not alone and we are always here to lend a listening ear and some support.
Can sense that you are in much distress from the symptoms you have described such as problems sleeping, emotional eating, feeling like your mind is in a mess and feeling generally anxious. The stress of all that is happening is truly getting you! 
Might I suggest some quick and simple ways you could try out to calm yourself down?
- Deep breathing exercises: Take slow, deliberate breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. Make the out breath longer than the in breath, for example, count to four breathing in and count to 6 breathing out.
- Progressive muscle relaxation: Tense and then relax different muscle groups in your body, starting with your toes and moving up to your head.
- Mindfulness meditation: Focus your attention on the present moment, without judgment.
- Visualization: Imagine yourself in a peaceful, safe place.
- Grounding techniques: Focus on your five senses, such as the feeling of your feet on the ground or the sounds around you.
- Quick physical activity: Take a short walk or do some stretching exercises.
- Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings to process and release them.
- Listen to calming music or nature sounds.
- Take a warm bath or shower.
- Practice a simple mantra, such as “I am safe” or “I can handle this.”
Remember, the key is to find what works for you and make it a regular part of your self-care routine which should include a healthy, balanced diet, good sleep hygiene and movement. Do give the above a try and see what helps you.
Also hear that you feel that you can’t talk to your family as you think they might judge you. I am guessing your form teacher and classmates (other than those involved) aren’t people you can go to as well? Wonder, if you think hard, is there anyone you can possibly reach out to for some support or simply hang out? Sometimes, when we do reach out to people, we might be pleasantly surprised as to who emerges to stand by us/support us.
If you are still in school, may I encourage you to approach your school counsellor for a chat? If you are part of a religious organisation, you may also consider approaching some youth leaders and/or counsellors (if available). There are also community resources you may like to tap on such as:
Touch Community Services: 1800-377-2252
Care Corner Counselling Centre: 1800-353-5800
eCounselling Centre (Fei Yue): ec2.sg - Fei Yue
LimitlessSG: https://www.limitless.sg/
Samaritans of Singapore (SOS): 1-767 or message them via Caretext (https://www.sos.org.sg/)
Hope this helps! Do hang in there! Remember you are not alone and all things eventually will pass. Take time to self-care and don’t make any big/important decisions when you are not in a good space.
Take good care of yourself!
Northernlights