hi, i’m a student struggling to cope with academic pressure as well as family issues. my parents tend to be overbearing especially with my choice of friends, and it’s driving people away from me. my parents aren’t supporting me after 18 and i just feel so tired of worrying about making ends meet while completing my studies. is there any way i can cope healthily instead of feeling the urge to self harm?
Hi @lette
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings on this platform, it takes a lot of courage to be real and authentic with your struggles and I commend you for your bravery. I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through such a stressful time, as I can see that you’re dealing with a lot of pressure both academically and at home.
I think that you are really resilient, for wanting to seek help and support (instead of turning to self-harming first) and I want to affirm your efforts by sharing with you a few things you can try instead:
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Seek Support from the people around you: Try to talk to someone you trust about what you’re going through, whether it’s a friend, family member, teacher, or a counselor at your school. Sometimes when you share honestly about your feelings, it can provide relief and often can help you to find other ways to be supported. You can also consider having an open and honest conversation with your parents about your feelings and their expectations. It’s possible that they may not be fully aware of the pressure you’re under or the impact it’s having on your mental health.
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Time Management and Self-Care: It might be helpful for you to create a realistic study schedule that allows for short breaks and self-care moments. Learning to balance your academic responsibilities with self-care activities can help reduce stress
Self care can look like exercise, meditation, or hobbies you enjoy. These activities can be helpful in managing stress and improving your overall well-being. Want to know more about self care? Read this: https://mindline.sg/youth/article?type=resource&resource-id=888 and https://mindline.sg/youth/article?type=resource&resource-id=883 -
Seek Professional Help: If you’re feeling the urge to self-harm or experiencing persistent thoughts of self-harm, it’s crucial to seek professional help immediately. You don’t have to go through this alone, and there are mental health professionals who can provide the support and guidance you need.
Whenever you feel overwhelmed and feel the urge to self-harm, please contact these hotlines:
a. SOS: 1-767
b. SOS whatsapp: Share on WhatsApp
c. IMH - 63892222
Just remember, it’s okay to ask for help, and taking care of your mental health is just as important as your academic success. You deserve support and the opportunity to navigate this stressful season but in a healthy way. Please also try your best to reach out to a trusted person or professional who can provide more direct support for you during this time.
Lastly, let us know how you’re doing and if any of the strategies worked/helped – keep us updated here Please take care of yourself!
hi @lette!
i agree with @cottonsoul , it sounds like you have multiple concerns that don’t seem to have straightforward solutions… I can only imagine how overwhelming and stressful it would be to attempt to juggle the financial and social concerns on top of the stress from academics 
With regard to your question, here’s a few suggestions for your consideration (though, if none of these are an apt fit for your lifestyle or preferences, it’s totally ok as well! it definitely takes time to slowly explore and find out which coping mechanism may work better)
building on the notion of self-care that cottonsoul suggested, there’s a few aspects of self care that you could look into:
- physical (eating healthily, staying active, getting enough sleep)
- emotional (self-expression through art, music etc., self-compassion, journaling)
- spiritual (spending time with self, connecting with nature, meditation)
I hope that some of these strategies can aid you in coping with the stressors that may be out of your control, and perhaps act as outlets to express your emotions and release some of the accumulated stress! Though ultimately, I do acknowledge that your situation is complex and it may take more than the self-care strategies I listed above to cope with the stressors. In this case, perhaps talking to professionals (be it in-person mental health professionals, or through online platforms such as CHAT, EC2 or Limitless’s discord) may help alleviate your situation!
Once again, thank you so much for your courage to share this with us, and do take care amidst everything!
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