I’ve been through a lot lately, and I’ve finally realized I need help. My parents were very toxic, and when I was only 13, they demanded I drop out of school because I spent time with my friends. Because of them, I didn’t finish my education and don’t have any qualifications. Now, at 22, I’m struggling to find work without a certificate and feel completely lost. I don’t know what to do, where to start, or what path to take. I’m unsure of who I am anymore. I used to be outgoing and cheerful, but now I’m quiet and lost.
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Hey @Isha , I’m really sorry you’ve been through so much. It sounds incredibly tough, especially at such a young age. It’s completely understandable to feel lost and uncertain after what you’ve experienced. What your parents did was unfair, and it’s not your fault that things turned out this way.
It’s brave of you to recognize that you need help. That’s such an important first step. Even though you don’t have formal qualifications right now, that doesn’t define your worth or your future. There are many paths forward, and with support, you can start to explore what feels right for you.
You’re still discovering who you are, and that’s okay. The outgoing, cheerful person you remember is still inside you. It just might be buried under some pain and confusion right now. Healing takes time, but you don’t have to do it alone.
Would you like help figuring out some first steps or finding resources to support you? I’m here to listen and help however I can.
Heyy @Isha, thank you so much for opening up and sharing, that takes a lot of courage, especially after everything you’ve been through.
It sounds like you’re feeling really overwhelmed and stuck right now . Having your education cut short at such a young age and dealing with toxic family dynamics must have been incredibly painful and confusing. And now at 22, without the support or guidance you deserved, you’re carrying the weight of trying to rebuild your life from scratch which is a heavy burden for anyone to bear.
I hear you when you say you don’t know who you are anymore. That feeling of losing yourself after years of just trying to survive is something many people can relate to and it’s valid.
But here’s something I want to remind you of, the fact that you’re seeking help now, that you still want to move forward despite everything, that shows strength 
. You’re not broken, even if you feel lost.
Would you be open to looking into adult education or job training programs at your own pace? There are often free or low-cost community resources that can help you get a certificate or pick up a skill. Maybe even just starting with one small step like speaking with a social worker, career counsellor, or trusted community centre could help give you direction.
And also, just because you were silenced before doesn’t mean your voice is gone. You still have time to reconnect with that cheerful, outgoing part of yourself she’s still there, just buried under all the hurt 
.
You deserve support, and you don’t have to walk this road alone. What’s something you might be willing to try this week, even something small that brings you a bit closer to feeling like “you” again?
hey isha
sounds like you’ve had to carry a lot of unfairness, especially at a time when you should’ve been figuring out who you were.
you mentioned your parents were toxic and pushed you out of school just for being with friends.. that sounds so harsh. like you were punished for being a teenager.
so of course now everything feels blurry. of course it’s hard to know where to begin. how could anyone know what path to take if they were never allowed to walk their own?
you said you used to be outgoing and cheerful. you still are that person, yeah? not gone. just buried. maybe she’s been waiting behind the quiet, watching to see if it’s safe to come back.
let’s not start with work or qualifications just yet. can we begin with this,.. what’s one thing you used to enjoy when you felt like yourself? even if you don’t enjoy it now, what’s one thing that made sense back then?
you don’t have to solve your life today. but you do deserve to have someone walk beside you as you slowly remember what safety feels like. we are here. not to rush you. just to stay with you while you figure out how to move again.
Hey @Isha. Thank you so much for trusting us with this even though it’s heavy. I can only imagine how painful it must have been to be forced to give up something as important as your education, especially at such a young age and for such an unfair reason. You’ve been through so much, and it makes complete sense that you feel lost.
But even in all that pain, I hear something powerful in your words: you’ve realized you need help. That awareness takes so much strength, and it shows deep down, you still care about your future. That matters more than you know.
Not having formal qualifications doesn’t take away your worth, your potential, or your ability to build a meaningful life. There are paths forward whether it’s learning a new skill, exploring adult education or short training programmes or courses, volunteering to gain experience, or even just taking time to figure out what excites or motivates you again. Small steps matter, and they count.
This is not the end of who you are, it’s the beginning of a new chapter, one where you get to decide what comes next. You’re 22, still so young, and while the journey ahead may feel uncertain, there are still so many possibilities for you. It’s okay not to have everything figured out yet. You’re not behind, you’re just beginning from a place that many people don’t see.
And that outgoing, cheerful part of you? It’s still there. You’ve just been in survival mode for so long. One step at a time, you can start to reconnect with that version of you again.
You’re not a failure, you were let down by the people who should’ve protected and supported you. But now you’re choosing to reach out, to seek something different. That takes incredible courage. And you don’t have to do it all alone.
If it ever feels too overwhelming, know that there are counsellors, support services, and kind people out there who are trained to walk alongside you. It’s okay to ask for help, not because you’re weak, but because you deserve support.
One small step at a time. You’re not behind. You’re starting, and that’s something to be proud of 
Hey @Isha, what happened to you wasn’t your fault. No child should ever have to choose between family approval and their education. I can’t imagine the pain you’ve gone through, carrying the consequences of choices that weren’t even yours. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.
But I also want to tell you, your story isn’t over. You’re only 22. I know you might feel that its late compared to the people around you, but trust me it’s not. People reinvent themselves at any age. And the fact that you’re even thinking about your future right now? That’s a sign of strength. You’re really brave for acknowledging that you need help and I’m so proud of you 
Don’t give up OP! I know friends who finished their O levels at 25, and some who earned their university degrees in their 40s. Take things one step at a time, maybe you want to start by sharing what you’d like to do? Like any plans going back to study, picking up a skill or finding a job? I’d love to help in any way I can!
hi @Isha ,
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story.
I’d say if you are struggling financially, you can start by working part-time/full-time at F&B establishments. The pay may not be high, but at least you have a steady stream of income. The next thing is to study while you are working (i am assuming your struggles are due to money and employability).
Since you did not finish school, you can either continue where you left off or learn something that does not require prior knowledge (which is what I would recommend you to do, simply because it is a way faster route to getting a decent paying job).
Let’s take programming for example, anyone can be a programmer, just require a computer (if you do not already have one, it is not very costly to get a decent one, used or new). Watch YouTube tutorials and/or read e-textbooks (there are free ones on the internet). You can be an employable programmer within 6 months (or sooner). You can also get certifications through learning platforms like Udemy to boost your employability (Udemy is not that expensive, from what I’ve heard). In terms of cost, the computer would be your biggest expense.
All the best to you! 