hi guys, i realised that goals are very important motivations to survive or thrive in the working world. the problem is, i attempted before so there weren’t really much goals to work towards to to begin with before my attempt. People’s goals usually involve buying and collecting stuff, working for their kids or family. I have no interest in having children or starting a family. buying things wont make me happy either. I’ve recovered from suicidal thoughts and want to live now. the problem is that i haven’t found a career that i am in love with. i do like designing but the toxic working hours makes me hate the design industry. im gonna go for a coding bootcamp n hope that i would like it by the end of it even though i dont really like it currently. what would make me happy is to just make songs everyday until it becomes a good enough income but we all know that that isnt allowed or practical, so im kinda stuck in this situation with my goals, happiness and motivation
Hello,
I’m really sorry to hear about your previous suicidal thoughts, I hope that you are in a much better place now and I want to commend your bravery in continuing and wanting to live.
From what I’m understand, it seems that you have trouble finding a career path or general direction in life that is suitable to your needs.
It’s good that you have a general sense of knowing what you want though, in this case it’s design. And it’s also good that you are trying out different things to identify your wants in life, in this case coding. Many times, what we think we want and what we truly want may be misaligned, such as in many cases whereby people find out they do not actually like the course of study they applied for.
I’m unable to fully understand the predicament you’re in and the confusion you may be facing in your life. But a personal opinion I’d like to offer is for you to go with what your heart feels like the most. Even if a career option may not be financially the best decision, if it makes you happy and continue living you should go with it. The inverse is true as well, if a career pays well and it does not make you as happy, it still can be a good option, as many times our hobbies need not be our career.
Perhaps you can do some cost-benefit analysis? Such as writing down the pros and cons in a table and comparing them, and tiering them based on how badly you want them.
Best of luck!!
Hello!
First of all, thank you so much for reaching out here it takes a lot of courage to be so upfront with your issues. Hopefully, you are feeling better and good job on working on your suicidal thoughts! You must have been through so much…
From what I can see, you seem to be juggling between the idea of practicality and happiness. Although ideally, making songs in hopes of transitioning to this line of career is what you want, you have also considered that it may not be as successful as having a stable-incomed job.
Additionally, I know you have mentioned that the design industry has toxic working hours but would you want to try being a freelanced designer? Or would you mind joining another design company that hopefully has a more flexible working schedule?
If I may offer some advice, How about finding a decent job that does not make you too stressed and still writing songs in your free time? You can even upload your songs on SoundCloud or even spotify to test the waters!
I am very sorry that I cannot provide the best advice However, I can help pray that you would like the coding BootCamp! Have a great week ahead!
Hello @user1138 ! Thank you for sharing how you’re feeling and reaching out too! It seems like you’re going through a period of self-discovery and figuring out what you like and don’t. It is understandable to feel lost and confused while figuring it out.
Firstly, I would like you to feel reassured that your goals and motivations don’t need to look or resemble anyone else’s as we are all living or going through different things therefore it is very difficult to pinpoint what is “right or wrong”. Many individuals discover their sense of purpose outside of conventional markers such as family or possessions, and it seems like you’re looking for what’s actually significant to you. It’s OK to take your time
Your discovery of a creative interest in design and a love for music indicates that you already have an inner compass directing you. This insight is incredibly useful, even when you feel like you have to choose between your passions and what’s practical. Even if it’s not always simple to convert interests into a reliable source of money, you may still include what you love in your life—even if you do it unconventionally
Regarding the professional aspect, it is reasonable to have disagreement. It’s great that you’re giving yourself the opportunity to explore different things, even though the design profession could tire you due to the long working hours and coding might not thrill you just now. The bootcamp could lead to new possibilities, and sometimes our perceptions of certain professions or sectors shift when we realise the potential they provide. Be open-minded, but also keep in mind that you may find fulfilment outside of your work. It could serve as a means to an end, giving you the security to follow your genuine interests when the time is right.
Try setting more manageable, short-term objectives for yourself, such as scheduling time for music, completing the coding bootcamp, or taking up a new pastime, rather than concentrating on ambitious, long-term objectives that might seem overwhelming. These baby steps may help you gain momentum and eventually choose which course seems appropriate without putting too much pressure on you to know everything at once.
Lastly, anytime you need to talk to someone but don’t have anyone to go to, feel free to write them here (if you’re comfortable)
Sometimes, goals are just out of reach.
helloo @user1138, thank you for sharing, I’m so proud of you for fighting through your suicidal thoughts. hope you are in a better place now just wanted to say that its ok to have different goals from others, you dont necessarily have to limit goals to buying, collecting stuff, starting a family all that. everyone has different interests and aspirations in life, and some might dream big while others wish to live a peaceful and quiet life. there’s really no right or wrong because what matters most is that you are happy and well.
of course, its also important to consider the practical aspects of living. personally i like to consider these two things when making a decision or goal:
- do i really enjoy doing this?
- can this help me pursue the things i enjoy?
to put it into perspective, i hear that you enjoy making songs, but you are worried about the practicality of pursuing it. furthermore you seem to not enjoy your current job due to the toxic working hours. so perhaps you could find another job that fits your needs better, such as better working hours, or something in the music industry. this could give you more free time to pursue song writing as a hobby.
i understand that this is all easier said than done, but finding the balance between practicality and doing the things you enjoy can take quite awhile, and that’s totally okay! i know a lot of people spending years changing from one job to another to find the perfect one for them, so yes its okay if you are still unsure about your goals. i hope you’ll be kind to yourself and give yourself time to explore what works for you❤️