Anxiety Disorder?

[wonder123]

Not exactly sure if i am hit with an Anxiety Disorder. Here to find out.
Parents-in-law with no financial planning and awareness. Used to been in a number of debts, currently kept getting the hub to make monetary transfer to debtors and we need to always keep be reminded to collect it back (as not our responsibility to pay off). This caused me worries every few days that they may forget to pay back. They used to borrow money from us and defaulted repayment cause me to stop trusting them and their words. Every calls from them to hub, lead me thinking nothing good. Apart, they also tried borrowing money to purchase luxury items to show others which is so wrong in my definition. All these, im so tired of keeping myself reminded how much they have outstanding from the bank transfers.

also, at work i keep feeling people are talking about me when i hear whispers among my staff and it got me affected that i feel im not doing a good job as a superior.

I also quite frequently worry my health. Very afraid of Cancers and sometimes over checks myself and some feelings got me thinking if i have issues with my health even though i have check up done yearly and last was few months back. It drained me so much.

Please help, tired out worrier here.

[CaringBee]

Dear @wonder123

Thank you so much for sharing all of this—it sounds like you’ve been carrying a lot on your shoulders, and I can feel how heavy and overwhelming it’s become. What you’re describing—constant worry, difficulty trusting, feeling on edge at work, and anxiety about your health—is not just stress. These are very real emotional burdens that can wear a person down, and it’s fully understandable that you’re feeling drained.

It’s completely valid to feel anxious when you’re in a situation where trust has been broken—especially by people who should feel like family. When you have to constantly monitor finances, follow up on repayments, and worry about whether boundaries will be crossed again, it makes sense that your body and mind are on high alert. It’s not your fault for reacting this way—it’s your mind trying to protect you in an unpredictable situation.

And then on top of that, you’re managing responsibilities at work, where you feel watched and judged, and even your own health becomes a source of fear. That’s a lot for one person to hold alone. The fact that you’re still standing, still trying to make sense of it all, shows how strong and caring you are—even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.

It’s possible that what you’re going through could be linked to anxiety—especially if your thoughts feel intrusive, persistent, and difficult to switch off from. But please know: you’re not alone, and you’re not overreacting. These feelings are valid and deserve care and support. It might really help to speak with a mental health professional—not because something is “wrong” with you, but because you deserve peace, clarity, and rest from this constant mental pressure.

In the meantime, please be kind to yourself. You’ve been trying to manage so much without a break, and no one is meant to do it all alone. The worry, the exhaustion, the self-doubt—it’s a signal that you’ve been carrying more than your share. And it’s okay to seek help to set it down.

We’re here to listen and support you. You are not alone in this. And things can get better—with time, understanding, and the right support, you can find a sense of calm again.

[scrambledegg]

It sounds like you’re carrying a heavy mental load, and it’s completely understandable that you feel drained. You’re dealing with financial stress from your in-laws, workplace anxiety, and health-related worries—all of which individually can already take a toll on your well-being, and you’re dealing with them altogether.

Since your in-laws have a history of defaulting, consider stopping financial assistance altogether. Let your husband handle their calls and requests. If money must be loaned, keep a written agreement with deadlines for repayment + Maybe set up an automated reminder to check on repayments once a month instead of every few days; this reduces the mental burden. You’re right about it not being your responsibility to pay off their loans. Whilst I’m not exactly sure what the dynamics are here, I hope you are on/try to get on the same page as your husband for this matter, and make the decisions most beneficial for yourselves moving forward. I know filial piety is important, but it doesn’t consist of taking your children for granted and stressing them out over something that is within your control.

If these worries are affecting your daily life significantly, seeing a therapist or counselor could be of great help. They can teach you techniques to manage overthinking, set boundaries, and regain control over your thoughts.

You’re not alone, and know that these feelings are not a personal failing! With small steps, you can find relief.