Dealing with a dishonest father!

First time being very dishonest:
I told my father that I didn’t want to see “them” many times, but when I was in the living room doing my things, my father was in the bedroom calling “them”. Suddenly my father turned his phone to face me so that “them” could see me. When I asked him about it, he said that he accidentally turned his phone to me.

The second time being very dishonest:
Knowing that I would find out he was facing the phone at me, he took pictures of me and sent them to “them”.
It was Chinese New Year, and I went to visit “them”, my father was using his phone, so he asked me to use “her” phone. After switching on “her” phone, I immediately saw the photo of me on WhatsApp. I shouted at my father, asking him if he had sent the pictures of me. He said that his phone and “her” phones are linked together.
I knew he was being very dishonest and lying to me and I shouted at him saying he was very dishonest. Suddenly “the no common sense aunty” shouted at me and said "你很固执。。。and ”a spoiled brat”(which she did not teach her at all) shouted back “对了”. I went back up to the room and felt extremely angry. After 10 minutes, she came up to apologize to me (how fake/she had scolded me for nothing a few years ago.)

About ”a spoiled brat”
When I was 7 years old, my mother bought a toy for me and her to play with. While playing beside her, she suddenly used her elbows to hit my face. “the no common sense aunty” said that she had done it accidentally. Luckily, my mother recorded a video of her bullying me. But Tee Mei Loon still denied it and ”a spoiled brat,” said “谁叫他站在那边”.

Third time being dishonest:
When we attended a wedding at Sentosa, my father took a picture of everyone including me eating the food. Suddenly, I heard the WhatsApp sending button sound. I snatched the phone and the video on his phone. Being a dishonest person, he told me that he had accidentally sent the video.

Most recent:
My father said that he wanted to go to Malaysia to meet “them” and I signed a contract with him and said Activity time: 30 minutes x2 25/11/2023. But, he did not have the activity with me and had even shouted at me.

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That sounds hard to deal with when your father does not seem keen on respecting your boundaries. If you haven’t tried before, maybe you could try sitting down with your father and having a serious discussion on why his actions could cause discomfort and how you feel about it. If he still doesn’t respect your decisions, then there’s really no choice about it. Your frustrations are understandable, I hope you manage to find a solution soon!


What does your mum think? Does she have any advice on how to deal with your father? I get how it feel very frustrating and almost feels like an invasion of your privacy.

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