hi, I’ve been recently told by my supervisor that she will likely give me a bad grade at work. Having worked in the organisation for more than 15 years, I’ve slogged and did my best only to get this type of results. I feel that she’s biased and treats me like toilet paper, only treating me better when I’m of use to her then now throwing me away.. I thought I won’t be affected but these few days I’ve been feeling the depression coming bk. She was the cause of my earlier depression bouts when she picked on every single thing I did but I tried to get over it, now it’s coming bk bc of what she said. I like my job, just that she’s really making me feel very sad n no self worth. I ever thought of just ending my life but thought it’s not worth it. Feeling helpless and useless….
Dear @user5429
Thank you for sharing what has been happening at work. It’s an achievement to chalk up 15 years of loyal service so well done on this milestone.
I agree with you that it’s demoralising and demotivating to hear that your hard work and sincere efforts are not valued. To be belittled and unfairly treated at work is hurtful and understandably has been affecting your mental health and overall wellbeing.
I recommend that you keep a clear and complete record of the specific occasions and feedback, unfair treatments, including dates and time of incidents. Consult a trusted friend / mentor / colleague who can be objective and give you a balanced assessment of what has been happening to gain another perspective. Speaking to a HR staff in confidence to air your grievances may be useful, and to discuss options available to you. If your company is unionised and you are a union member, do also consider to lodge your case with them, so that a proper and due process to investigate your grievances is done.
Meanwhile, as you go through this challenging period, please do remember to allocate time for yourself to recharge. Care for yourself by pursuing hobbies, resting, exercising and spending time with your loved ones. Aim to develop yourself holistically in all life dimensions, and to live an expansive fulfilling and meaningful life you fully deserve.
Please take good care, and take it one day at a time. Keep reaching out here for support whenever needed. 