So I’m not sure if i have anxiety but I kinda suspect it. I tend to have a really bad breakdown whenever someone so much as yells at me. I struggle with staying focus and I cant help but overthink everything, sometimes I’ll wonder if my friends like me or if they’re talking ■■■■ about me behind my back. Besides just that, I have such a huge fear of failure or getting things wrong that I can’t even do my own homework if I’m not 1000% sure that my answers will be right, and this hinders with my performance in school. so I really just wanna know if it’s anxiety or normal?
hi @annoynimous,
you’ve been holding a lot. i don’t want to overload you with questions.
some people find it helpful to talk with a counsellor when the fear of failure build up like this. i’m not saying you have to, but if that’s something you’re thinking about, it can help you figure out what it might be like. or we can just stay here, no pressure.
because what you’re going through is overloaded by all the signals that the world isn’t safe for mistakes, or for feelings.
So if you know that this is normal, than what does it do to help you?
Hey @Annoynimous , from what you’ve shared I can gather that you are worried about whether the symptoms and signs that you see are indicative of anxiety.
Talking to a counsellor or therapist would be best if you want to seek professional advice about your situation; however, if that’s uncomfortable, that’s understandable.
One thing you can try out is to pen down each time you feel anxious on a notebook; this can help you to get a better understanding of how much you are affected by anxiety. After a few weeks, you can review this journal, and if it is indicative that it does severely affect your daily way of life and your mental state, then it would be best to talk to a counsellor or therapist about it.
So for now, don’t overwhelm yourself, take things one step at a time, and don’t be afraid to share when you feel bottled up! 
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hey @Annoynimous , it seems like the challenges you’re experiencing have been affecting both your well-being and your ability to engage fully in school. It’s great that you’ve acknowledged these feelings as that alone is a commendable first step. But I’d strongly encourage you to seek professional advice to explore any underlying anxiety or related challenges that may be contributing to how you’re feeling. I think that speaking with a professional may offer more clarity to help you navigate what youre going through. Or we can just stay here too if you’d like!
In the meantime, please do take care of yourself and take things one step at a time. Rooting for you always 
hi @Annoynimous ,
I am sorry to learn that you have been going through these things all this time. Like others have mentioned, you should consider seeing a professional. Your mental health is important!
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Hi @Annoynimous,
I’m really sorry to hear how tough things have been for you. It must be incredibly painful to worry whether your friends like you, whether you’ll get things wrong, or whether you’ll fail. It sounds like you’re feeling overwhelmed by so many thoughts and emotions. It’s a really positive sign that you’re trying to understand why this is happening and what it might mean.
As others have suggested, it could be really helpful to talk to a counsellor or therapist. They can help you make sense of what you’re experiencing—whether it’s the difficult thoughts, lack of focus, or strong emotions—and they can also provide you with tools to help you manage and work with them. Is that something you might be open to?
In the meantime, are there things you can do that help you feel a little better when these thoughts come up? Maybe there’s a song that lifts your mood, or you could go for a walk? I also wonder if there’s a friend you feel safe talking to about how you’re feeling. Sometimes sharing our worries with someone we trust can help ease the fear that we’re not liked—and often, our friends do want to be there for us.
Please know that you’re not alone. It’s genuinely admirable that you’re reaching out for support 
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Hi @crispycreme,
I really appreciate you replying to this and trying to help me understand it. I have tried conselling before, but I stopped after 2 sessions because I felt really uncomfortable with sharing my deep thoughts or feelings face to face where someone knows my true identity. As for writing in a notebook, I can try that, but I’m really scared that if it falls into my parent’s hands, they’ll be disappointed or hurt.
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Hi @Annoynimous,
It sounds like you’re carrying a lot of emotional weight, and it’s exhausting not knowing whether what you’re feeling is “normal” or something deeper. You’re describing moments of intense distress - like breaking down when someone raises their voice, feeling paralyzed by the fear of making mistakes, and constantly second-guessing your relationships - which all seem to be taking a toll on your ability to focus and feel secure. That kind of inner turmoil isn’t just about being sensitive or perfectionistic; it feels like you’re stuck in a loop of self-doubt and pressure that’s hard to escape. You’re not alone in feeling this way, and it makes sense that you’re wondering if it might be anxiety - because what you’re describing does echo a lot of what people with anxiety experience.
If you would like to explore these issues with a professional, CHAT (https://www.imh.com.sg/CHAT/Get-Help/Pages/default.aspx) offers free mental health assessments to anyone aged 16 to 30. They would also be able to refer you to other community services for counselling and therapy.
Best regards,
HanSolo2000
Befriender | let’s talk by mindline
Hey @Annoynimous , thanks for sharing further. I understand from what you’ve written that you are worried about your parents discovering the journal, and about your past attempts to go for counselling.
Regarding the journal, perhaps you can try alternatives like typing it down on your phone instead (and if need be locking it with a password) so that only you will be able to access it. That way, others will only know about your situation only when you want them to know.
As for counselling, I completely empathise with you being uncomfortable having to strip bare all your emotions in front of someone else face-to-face. In your own capacity, you can take steps to manage your anxiety. You can try out relaxation techniques such as meditation and deep breathing; or self-directed Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, where you learn to identify and challenge harmful thoughts, and make them more healthy and realistic. There are many online resources available that you can go check out if you are interested!
However, if you still feel greatly affected by anxiety despite such efforts, then it would really be best to seek professional advice, as they are equipped to provide you with concrete treatment plans that can help you best.
Perhaps you can try going to a GP or polyclinic to seek medical advice; the environment may be less stigmatising, since the doctor would be someone who does not know you beforehand. You can also bring along a trusted friend or adult for the chat, if that makes you feel more at ease knowing that there’s someone you can rely on there with you.
Please feel free to share if you have any other concerns or worries; the community here will be more than happy to hear and help you out!
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Hello @Annoynimous Thanks for sharing that. It sounds really tough, and I’m glad you’re reaching out and being open about what you’re feeling. It’s completely valid to feel scared or stuck when these thoughts and feelings take over. You’re not alone in this, and it’s okay to have these struggles. What you’re noticing about yourself shows a lot of self-awareness, which is a good first step.
If these feelings are interfering with your daily life or causing you distress, it might be helpful to talk to a counselor, therapist, or trusted adult who can help you explore these feelings more deeply and support you in finding ways to cope.
In the meantime, be kind to yourself and try to remind yourself that making mistakes is a normal part of learning and growing. Would you like some tips on managing these feelings or ways to cope when you start to feel overwhelmed?