whenever i achieve something, It’s never enough. Everyone tells me to be proud of myself but when I’m actually starting to be proud of myself I get shot down. When I share about my feelings it quickly becomes about someone else. If I stop people pleasing suddenly im self centered. Must always be the nice person. Always the responsible one. Always the sensible one. Why must I be all those things just so people can be themselves? Why must I be an NPC even in my own life? Im tired everything. I really am. nothing I do is ever enough. I’m not enough.
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Hi @bornwithhorns,
It sounds like you’ve been carrying some heavy emotions lately, and I want to acknowledge how real and difficult that must feel for you. It’s completely normal to experience ups and downs, and your feelings are valid, whatever they may be. Sometimes, just having your emotions recognised can make a big difference.
I want you to know that you’re not alone in this. Based on what you have shared, being forced to be the “people pleaser” can indeed feel overwhelming or uncertain, and it’s okay to seek support during those times. I really appreciate your openness in sharing how you’re feeling, and we are here to listen and support you without judgment.
If you feel comfortable, would you like to share more about what’s been weighing on you lately? Are there certain situations or thoughts that have been especially challenging? I’m here to listen. Whatever you choose to share is important, and your experiences matter.
hi, thank you for your reply. i actually dont know how to put every thing into words but the gist is that i feel like it’s always about others, never about me, even when it is supposed to be about me. An example would be maybe Im ranting about how i had a tough day, im only seeking some comfort but the response is usually something along the lines of someone else has it worse, then it becomes about that someone else. or when im experiencing something it gets brushed off. But then if the same thing happens to someone else im expected to deal with it and comfort them. i dont treat people nicely for rewards but i really wish people would treat me the way i treat them . because im starting to feel like a fool
hii, i’m really sorry you’re feeling this way. it sounds exhausting that you’re expected to always be the nice, responsible, and sensible one, then still get shut down the moment you try to be proud of yourself or share what you’re feeling. it sounds super unfair 
you are enough, even if people around you are being discouraging!! just like everyone else, u deserve to be cared about without having to earn it by being perfect.
Hi there, thanks for sharing how you feel. It sounds incredibly exhausting to feel like you always have to be the strong, responsible one while your own feelings get pushed aside. Anyone would feel worn down in that situation. Wanting your achievements to be acknowledged and wanting space for your own feelings doesn’t make you selfish, it just means you’re human and you want to be seen and valued too.
When people get used to someone always being the “nice” or dependable one, they sometimes expect that role without realizing how much pressure it puts on that person. But you are not an NPC in your own life. Your feelings, needs, and accomplishments matter just as much as anyone else’s.
It’s also important to say this: the feeling that you’re “not enough” often comes from being in environments where your efforts aren’t reflected back to you, not from your actual worth. The fact that you keep trying, achieving things, and caring about others already says a lot about who you are.
If you can, try to give yourself permission to take up space, even if it feels uncomfortable at first. And it may help to share how tired you feel with someone who can really listen, like a trusted person or a counselor. You deserve support and recognition, not just the role of holding everything together for everyone else. You matter too:)