Hi, I’ve been really frustrated over this recently…
In recent exams, I have been ‘giving up’- I give up trying to do questions and just wait until the exam is over/ stop trying to improve my answers/ do slower and think that I’ll just improve afterwards or try again harder next exam.
This is really bad- I lose marks and do worse in exams.
In a recent exam (in fact, an hour ago) I couldn’t think of a good explanation for my answer and kept looking at the clock. I felt that I wasn’t going to do well and that I would do better next time, thus I just slowed down and stop trying to improve my answer.
Why do I do this? What steps can I take to reduce my exam anxiety?
Thank you for sharing this — it really sounds tough, and I can imagine how frustrating it must feel to walk out of an exam knowing you didn’t give it your all not because you didn’t care, but because something in you froze or gave up halfway through.
What you’re describing doesn’t mean you’re lazy or incapable — it sounds like a form of shutdown from anxiety or overwhelm. When we feel pressure to perform, especially if we doubt our ability in that moment, the brain sometimes defaults to avoidance as a protective mechanism. It tells us, “Just get through this,” instead of “Keep trying,” because effort can feel risky when we’re not sure we’ll succeed. It’s not that you don’t want to do well — it’s that your anxiety is tricking you into thinking it’s safer to give up early.
Some steps that might help:
Catch the inner dialogue
When the thought pops up — “I’ll just try harder next time” — gently pause and ask: Why not now? What’s stopping me from trying just a little more? Often it’s a fear of not being “good enough,” but effort in the moment always counts, even if the answer isn’t perfect.
Practise “micro-wins” mindset
Instead of thinking of exams as pass/fail events, try setting small goals: “I’ll give every question a try,” or “I’ll spend 30 seconds brainstorming before skipping.” This makes the task more manageable and reduces all-or-nothing thinking.
Reframe anxiety
That rising anxious feeling doesn’t mean you’re doomed — it actually means your brain cares. When anxiety shows up, remind yourself: “This is my body preparing to focus. I can still work with it.” You don’t have to feel perfectly calm to do well — just grounded enough to keep going.
Simulate exam pressure
Practise mock exams under timed conditions but with support afterwards. Don’t just mark them — reflect on when your brain wanted to give up, and how you can coach yourself differently in that moment.
Be compassionate, not critical
You’re not doing this on purpose. This pattern often builds from deeper fear or self-doubt. Try treating yourself like you would a friend — frustrated, yes, but still deserving of patience and encouragement. Growth comes from understanding, not punishing.
Brute-force it when needed (yes, seriously )
Sometimes when you catch your brain spiraling — just shut it up! Ignore the “I’m not good enough” voice, and do the opposite of what it’s telling you. You’re already in the exam — might as well make use of those few hours! Even if you think your answers are bad, just write them. Treat it as practice. If you don’t try, you’ll never know what your misconceptions are (and it’s rarely everything, even if it feels that way).
I’ve had a period where I bombed in school, but I still scribbled down whatever I could during papers — even if it was possibly 100% wrong. I’d laugh at my own answers and even imagine the markers’ reactions . Since you might not do well anyway, might as well feel proud that you tried (no matter how unorthodox the trying was!) and made the best of it.
Here’s a simple method:
Round 1: Do easy questions first (or skip this if nothing feels easy yet).
Round 2: Tackle the harder ones where you feel you might be able to figure something out.
Round 3: Try the questions you don’t know at all — even if it’s writing something random. Sometimes a eureka moment shows up when your subconscious has been working quietly in the background.
If this keeps happening and feels intense, talking to a school counsellor can help too — sometimes just having someone guide you through what’s going on in your mind makes a huge difference.
You’re not alone in this, and the fact that you’re noticing the pattern means you’re already taking the first step forward. Be kind to yourself — change takes practice, and you’re already on your way.
You’ve got this. Rooting for you — one small messy brave step at a time
I’m really sorry to learn that you’re feeling this way. Exam anxiety can be incredibly challenging and frustrating. It is understandable that you might feel overwhelmed and end up giving up during exams, and I can assure you that you are not alone in feeling this way, and this is very normal. Please do not feel discouraged as you can always improve yourself for the better — it is never too late!
You may be feeling this way because deep down you want to do well, and as what @knd mentioned, our minds can shut down as a way to cope with the stress. Some tips for you would be to start studying early, regularly review what you have already learnt, and do practice questions. You can even start doing timed practice tests nearing exam periods.
And remember to practice self-care and relaxation. We should not be studying for hours and hours without breaks in between! Do something you enjoy after a good study session to reward yourself for the hard work too!
I really get how tough this feels.. the advice that @knd and @Rotovap shared above is super practical
I just wanted to add that it’s completely okay to feel this way.
Exam anxiety can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t mean you’re not capable or that something is wrong with you. and I think our minds just react to stress in ways we don’t fully understand at first.
Be gentle with yourself as you figure this out.
Acknowledging how you feel and reaching out like you did here already shows strength. You’re taking steps to understand and overcome this, and that is really something to be proud of - You’ve got this, and we’re here to support you
I hear your difficultes on performing under highly stressful situations like examinations. Singapore’s education is highly rigorous and it is for sure no easy feat. I would like to commend your efforts and eagerness to study and do well - it truly takes alot of strength to navigate the tough school years.
Perhaps you are feeling overwhelmed by the exam - the situation of being in the hall, as well as the perceived importance of it may contribute. As such, it might lead to avoidance hence you slowed down in answering the question.
I would like you to know that different people have different ways of coping with stress, and you’re not alone. Here are some steps that you can take to reduce exam anxiety -
Before the exam, take deep breaths 5 times. Hold your breath for 5 slow seconds before exahling. This is an example of relaxation techniques to calm yourself down.
During the exam, practice positive self talk - tell yourself that you got this. You have put in the work, and your efforts will pay off.
Lastly, and argubly the most important of all, manage your mental health before the exams. During the preparation period, you’re likely under alot of stress. Take breaks to decompress and get plenty of sleep to recharge. This will help to manage your stress levels, preventing the stress from snowballing to lead to giving up during the exam
In our education system, it’s easy to let our grades define us - with the constant stress on academic performance and grades. But this is never true. You are so, so much more than the letters and numbers on your result slips. Please dont forget that.
I hear you. Exams are no easy task, and anxiety can cause you to freeze in such situations.
As someone who experiences exam anxiety myself, here are some insights that I can offer. Personally, I find that I am more anxious when unprepared, and try to overcompensate by cramming right before the exam. If you find yourself in a similar situation, I suggest starting as early as possible and setting clear goals of what you wish to achieve in the weeks leading up to the paper itself. I would also recommend that you do not stress yourself out further by doing last minute revision before stepping into the exam hall. Give yourself those few moments to get your breathing in check and recentre yourself, so that you are calm and collected before the exam starts. While this is not easy to do when you see your peers around you frantically flipping through their material outside the exam hall, you may want to step aside or find a corner where you can close your eyes and have a moment to yourself. Comparison is the thief of joy, and those who are rushing to get the last few pieces of information memorised may not be fully prepared! So do not feel like you are worse off for not doing so. Practising this allowed me to be more level-headed during my papers and I hope the same for you! Best of luck.
hi there !!! i hear you — there’s nothing wrong with what you’re doing and i completely feel you sometimes it might help to simply just reassure and reaffirm yourself that — using whatever resources, time and effort you had — you did your best, and that’s enough. on many occassions i’ve felt this way about exams, while on my end i do acknowledge that if i had managed my time well, i’d probably be able to have answered better since i would have understood the content more. however, at that present moment that you were taking your exams, there would be almost nothing you could do to change your situation, hence reframing your perspective might help you feel abit better. but just to remind u — u are not alone!!! i feel with you
Hello! I feel you, it can get frustrating when the anwer doesn’t seem clear during an exam. For me, I will usually just leave the questions I am unsure of to the end of the paper, I will continue doing the rest of the questions. Until I am done with those questions I can attempt, I will revisit those that I am unable to do. All the best OP
hey @user9136 , i’m sorry you’re feeling this way :(( exams can be really stressful and i totally understand the frustration and feeling at a lost when stuck on a question..
it’s really good that you acknowledge this problem and want to do better - and i’m proud of you for reaching out to get help/advice! i think like some of the replies have mentioned, the pressure to do well may cause us to freak out and underperform during the exam. it’s really not your fault for feeling this way - sometimes, our emotions may get the better of us but that doesn’t mean we’re lazy/unable to do well! learning to regulate stress and manage the voices in our head is a journey all of us are on, and you’re not alone on this journey
something i like to do before my exams would be to close my eyes and take deep breaths as im sitting infront of the paper, and tell myself that i can do it, and whatever the result may be i’ll walk out knowing i tried my best!! this helps me to gather my thoughts and focus on doing my best to answer all the questions with the time i have. it took me a while to find out how to manage my exam stress and its definitely still a work in progress. but we can take heart and celebrate our small wins!
i hope that you continue to be patient with yourself in this exam season, and know that we’re all here for you!! all the best for your upcoming exams and i’m cheering you on!!!
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. Since you might not do well anyway, might as well feel proud that you tried (no matter how unorthodox the trying was!) and made the best of it.
