Yesterday I visited my parents, which I usually do once a week. USUALLY it is fun, my mum and I discuss books, I help her order some stuff online, we eat something delicious while my father stumbles around drunk. He is alright if you don’t pay attention to him. But yesterday she HAD TO excitedly tell me how my cousin met and started dating a new girl, and how WONDERFUL it is that they met on my other cousin’s wedding, like it was writ in the stars or whatever. And THEN she looked at me disapprovingly and asked, why I didn’t get to know any guy at that wedding (we both also attended).
No, mum, sorry, your daughter is so boring, plain, meek, ugly, entirely lacking anything resembling charisma, quiet, introverted and afraid to open her mouth that NO, NO GUY APPROCHED MET AT THAT STUPID WEDDING! Maybe stop mentioning it every time we see each other? It really sucks that I am so devoid of any personality and no-one would date me even after I lose 5 kgs (175/56.8 now) and wear nice clothes. Surprise, people seem to see right through me and clock my stupid self-pitying, wallowing, weird hear and stay away from me. Ok, that’s fine, I have me, I can deal with that.
But I really HATE when my parents expect me to be this bubbly, easy-going, joyous pretty girl who gets everyone’s attention when she enters a room. BECAUSE I AM NOT THAT, AS MUCH AS I WANTED TO CHANGE. I can never be that. And I don’t understand their problem with that - they are both very closed-off, don’t have any friends and never invite anyone over (due to the father’s alcoholism). WHAT WOULD THEY EXPECT ME TO GROW INTO???
Thanks for sharing, I hear you. And I really understand cuz my parents are that kind too - wanting their girl here to be bubbly, easy going and so joyous pretty and all the world standards etc. I am single btw and to be you is okay- because trust me, I also quiet similar thou I can chatter lots but at times I really want to just chill and when I do- im pretty quiet, introverted too and trust me at my age where everyone is engaged and married - I am just single, NO GUYS too and there goes my fam - get a boyfriend etc.. but tbh, im just chill.
you dont have to conform to what fam says 
you are you and just be happy
the community here is great
Thank you for your kind words!
I try not to think that something is wrong with me since no-one is interested in me romantically… Maybe it’s because I think too much of it and make it a problem, and no-one really wants to date someone with problems ahah