How do I deal with a very dominant and micro manage supervisor?

Hangouts Rants
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Her voices are just unbearable and stuck in my mind. She can come in the office and just keep talking to the “screens” meeting all days with her other team virtually but not us who sitting physically. But on and off when my colleagues and I were having some discussion, she don’t even know what we are discussion but she like to add her points. It’s totally frustrating because she always like to give us her input when she didn’t even know the head and toe of what we are discussing !!!

With every topic she also like to show off. Then when reporting to boss she will like a sheep, everything suddenly seem very nice.

Today she just whole days talk talk talk and suddenly pull one of my colleague out for hours and “counselling” him. Then when she come back want the whole team listen to these guy presentation( which we all already discussed few days back, and submitted to our boss for approval). NOW THEN SHE BRING OUT AND DISCUSSED AGAIN, HELLO, WE ALSO HAVE OUR THING TO SETTLE, can you please don’t waste our time. I myself trying to listen while also settling my work, she kept showing her attitude and gestures and wanted us to concentrate to that. I just fared up and replied “YES, WE DISCUSSED ABOUT THIS FEW DAYS BACK AND THIS PARTICULAR PORTION I DID, for sure I know !” She quite!

I admit that I might be rude. But to be honest, I find you are ruder as you are making everyone in office felt so uneasy and uncomfortable.

many times I have to excuse myself out the office to find my peaceful environment to do my work, be it toilet or even staff rest room, that better than our own office whenever you were around. We don’t even dare to speak or have discussion because your presence. every-time Your sudden intrude or “opinion” make us felt very uncomfortable.

The most hated word “YOU GET WHAT I MEAN”, hello !!! I’m not the worm in your head ok ! I don’t know what you mean and I don’t even care. Cause whenever we look for you for an opinion or suggestion, we will not get any !! We rather speak to our boss directly and get a answer. These practice had been started since don’t know when, we all also mutual agreed about it without you to be honest. I know you might felt we didn’t respect you but yes to be honest, you don’t deserve our respect. Also to add on, speak to you, we still need to risk ourselves to get hand dirtier, you always make things worse. :weary_face::weary_face::weary_face:

thanks for providing a platform for me to ventilate. This issue had been an ongoing problem to me. Although I had decided to resign next year after getting my end year bonus. But from now to next year, I’m not sure I can hold it till then.

advise please, how do I deal with this. At least till next year Jan.

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Hi @Anobody

Thanks for sharing.

It must have been a very difficult situation. Since you have a clear exit plan, set that as a goal at the back of your mind to remind you on hard days.

What worked for me, is to always document. After discussions, email back a summary to confirm what has been discussed, this also gives the chance for the manager to ‘reflect’ and ‘correct’ any item if necessary. Overtime, such meetings will reduce as the manager will feel less of a need to micromanage. Usually such micromanaging stems from inferior complexity imo.

Till then, hang in there!

Also if you can, can you listen to music so you can drown out the chatter from the manager? I tend to work better when there’s no buzz around me, toxicity kills my creativity. :grimacing:

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Hey @Anobody. Wow, I can really relate to what you shared. I really hear your frustration as being around someone like that day in and day out can be so draining. I’ve had a colleague before who made the whole office feel heavy whenever they were around, and I remember how much energy it took just to get through the day. Sometimes I even found myself hiding away just to breathe or focus.

What helped me a little was reminding myself that their behaviour wasn’t about me, and finding small ways to create pockets of peace for myself, even if it meant stepping away for a while. It didn’t make the situation perfect, but it gave me some space to cope until I could move on.

Since you’ve already decided to resign next year, it might help to think of this period as “maintenance mode.” A few things that might support you until then:

  1. Boundaries for your peace: You’ve already noticed that stepping away to quieter spaces helps you focus. It’s okay to keep doing that when you need to.
  2. Pick your battles: Not every comment or interruption deserves your energy. Sometimes, letting go can protect your mental space.
  3. Grounding yourself in the bigger picture: Remind yourself this is temporary. You’re working toward your bonus and transition, and this is just one stage you’ll soon move past.
  4. Seek allies: If you have trusted colleagues, keep leaning on that mutual understanding. It can lighten the weight when you know you’re not alone in feeling this way.

You’re not alone in feeling this way, okay? I know this situation is really tough, but the fact that you’ve been reflecting and seeking healthier ways to handle it already shows strength.

Sending you patience and resilience as you make it through these next few months. You deserve peace at work :sunflower:

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Hi, Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

It sounds like you’re under a lot of stress, and having your emotional boundaries constantly pushed in your workplace is genuinely draining. I can hear just how frustrating and suffocating it feels to deal with this colleague’s behavior, especially when it seems like she’s not really listening or adding value, and her presence changes the vibe of the whole team.

You’re not alone in feeling this way about certain people at work. it’s a common experience, but that doesn’t make it any less exhausting or invalid. I’m see how you’re not being heard, not being respected, and not having your space or boundaries acknowledged.

It’s good you have an endpoint to look to, maybe you could try to anchor yourself there. Sometimes even having that definite escape can take the sting out, knowing each day is one less you have to endure.

Wishing you all the best!

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