(not self diagnosing bipolar.) this has been going on for quite a while. one moment i could be very happy and then the next when something happens i get very agitated or angry and that leads me to cry. however, to get me happy after that is way harder than to get me down. (the process of me changing moods from happy to crying could take as short as a minute) i want to know - is this normal? this is not recent and has been going on for the past few years. i also had really bad anger issues in the past but now its not so bad anymore and whenever it acts up, i just break myself instead of approaching the person directly. id get angry then cry subsequently. furthermore i dont think im an unreasonable person and dont have high expectations but when someone cant even meet my lowest i just feel so… disappointed? its not hard at all, they just dont want to put in the effort.
the main point of this post is: is it normal to feel this “bipolar” emotion? (adds on to my first post of feeling empty subconsciously) how do i fix it? i dont think therapy is needed for this. this is ruining my mental health and i need advice.
Hi throwawayacc,
Thank you for sharing your experience. To address your main concern: while experiencing mood changes is part of being human, the intensity/speed of your shifts, along with their impact on your mental health, may suggest that something deeper is going on.
Sudden shifts from happiness to anger or sadness can occur occasionally especially if you are under stress or dealing with unresolved emotions. However, when these shifts become frequent, intense and difficult to recover from, it may point to emotional dysregulation. This does not mean that anything is “wrong” with you. It simply means that your emotional responses might be more sensitive or reactive than average.
Some people naturally feel emotions more intensely and have a harder time soothing themselves after distress. You mentioned having anger issues in the past and now turning that anger inward (breaking yourself). Suppressing anger instead of addressing it can intensify emotional swings and lead to feelings of emptiness or self-blame.
Feeling disappointed when others do not meet your minimum expectations is valid but if these feelings persist, they could lead to feelings of frustration or sadness that build up over time.
This pattern does not necessarily mean you have a disorder but it does indicate a need to explore your emotions and coping mechanisms.
Since therapy is not an option you want to consider currently, my suggestion would be that you keep a journal and note your emotions throughout the day. Write down what you are feeling, what triggered it and how you reacted. Over time, this can help you identify patterns and gain more control over your responses.
When you feel like breaking yourself, try replacing those self-critical thoughts with kinder ones. For example, instead of saying “Why can’t I control my emotions?”, try thinking this: “My emotions are intense because I care deeply and that is okay.”
Please remember that you are not broken or alone. Emotions can feel overwhelming but with patience and the right tools, you can find more balance and peace. You are already taking the first step by seeking advice and that’s something to be proud of!
Hi @throwawayacc,
Thank you for sharing so openly about how you’ve been feeling. It’s clear that you’re carrying a lot right now, and I want to acknowledge your strength in recognising that something feels off and seeking advice.
First, it’s important to know that emotional sensitivity and quick mood changes can happen to many people, especially when life feels overwhelming or certain emotional needs aren’t being met. It doesn’t make you “abnormal” or unworthy of care. What you’re experiencing is valid, and it’s okay to want to understand it better.
The disappointment you feel when others don’t meet even your lowest expectations is something many of us can relate to. It can hurt deeply when you feel like you’re putting in effort while others don’t seem to reciprocate. One step forward could be identifying your needs and clearly expressing them to the people in your life. It’s not easy, but it can help you feel more understood and supported.
When it comes to the mood swings, having some grounding techniques can be helpful. For instance:
- Pause and Breathe: When you feel your emotions shifting quickly, take a moment to focus on your breathing. Inhale deeply for four counts, hold for four counts, and exhale for four counts.
- Name Your Feelings: Try to label what you’re experiencing—“I’m feeling hurt,” “I’m feeling disappointed.” Naming your emotions can help you regain control.
- Self-Check: Ask yourself, “What’s within my control right now?” Redirect your focus to things you can manage.
Finally, I want to gently emphasise that therapy doesn’t have to be viewed as a final option. It can be a safe space where you learn skills to navigate your emotions and feel less alone in your struggles. If that feels overwhelming, even journaling or talking to a trusted friend can be a starting point.
You’re not alone in this, and it’s acceptable to seek assistance and proceed cautiously. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s more than enough. Stay kind to yourself—you deserve it.