I don't know what is going on

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I dont know what im feeling at all

Its the last semester of polytechnic for me, im doing way better at studies than before, im helping out with projects more and overall school feels great with friends and i like everyone

Career wise im also a derivatives trader on the side, can make decent income (way more than your average student). Im also starting a new startup regarding trading which is going okay, nothing too crazy. Taking it slow

Besides that i am also being trained to be a financial consultant from people that i absolutely look up to and like, which is what i always wanted, but took a break for these 2 months to focus on last bit of school

Personal life-wise is great, talking to a potential someone these days, and the friends i have now are the closest friends ive had in my life. They have opened up new opportunities for me career wise and we have done nearly every teenage-thing possible from clubbing to travelling

Family is also great, i love everyone in my family

But i dont know why i feel so trapped, like a squeezed feeling. I feel like im not loose if that makes sense. It feels so weird, not really sad, not really empty, just super weird

I just feel like take my boxing gloves and smashing my head in a couple of times

Ive felt like this the past month, but last weekend i went to have drinks with my friends, we talked about life, girls and career, and for the next week I was at my best state

That was last week, and now I feel like absolute ■■■■ again and i have no idea why

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Hi @farzzrhm. Thank you for sharing what is working well and also not going so well in your life. I think it is wonderful that you have found joy in trading, are financial independent and have great relationships at home and also outside.

A couple of years back I was feeling the same way too. And as i researched, spoke to mentors, and was more well-read, i realised that it could have been my life PURPOSE that I was unclear about.

Here is something that helped me. You can try it to see if it works for you.

Ask yourself:

  • if you did not have school, family and friends, what would you be still excited to be waking up every day to do?
  • can this be a constant and not a milestone or goal? For eg if your goal is to earn $20,000 a month then once you meet this goal, you might feel empty again.

Crafting a personal purpose statement like this might help you gain better clarity.

My purpose is to (insert verb) (insert beneficiary) (insert how), to (insert result) (insert outcome).

eg. My purpose is to help young people gain greater awareness through education, to attain financial freedom so as to achieve their other life goals.

good luck!

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Does it feel like a sense of emptiness because everything is going kinda well and you need a new challenge of sorts?

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Hi @farzzrhm

First off, thanks for sharing with us about what you’re currently going through. You’re trying to figure out what you’re experiencing and perhaps why too, but no matter what it is, I wanna let you know that whatever emotions and thoughts about your current state is valid.

You seem to have a lot of self-awareness and you’ve made helpful choices when the situation calls for it - like taking a step back to focus on school, taking things one step at a time with regards to your startup, spending time with people that matter to you. I wanna commend you on that as that seems to be your personal strengths! I wonder with what you’re also feeling, it sounds like apathy but at the same time “trapped”, could it be signalling something about other areas or aspect of yourself (that’s unfulfilled)? :thinking:

I also wonder if you’re noticed when this kinda started for you? Did something happen to lead you to feel this way? Or has it kinda been there all this while? Perhaps you can take this opportunity to take stock of what you would want to do for yourself. I believe that you’re looking to live a life that is true to who you are and want to be. You can generate insight through a process of asking yourself a series of focused, open-ended questions, which encourages reflection, to gain new perspective and perhaps positive actions to take. This could be a gentle way to clarify any (mis)assumptions and allows you to revise what you think and say about those beliefs (by updating the belief to be more helpful).

Additionally, you can try the below exercises to help if you feel that things are beginning to get overwhelming for you:
• Being mindful
• Being kind to yourself
• Shifting (to a more helpful) perspective

Also, here’s a list of resources that you can check out if you’d like to speak to a professional as they can provide you with a safe space and work together with you to help you work things through:

  1. Samaritans of Singapore (1-767)
  2. James Cook University Clinic
  3. NIE Wellness Centre
  4. NUS Clinical & Health Psychology Centre

Remember that you deserve and can get the necessary support you need! Looking forward to hearing from you, take care! :slightly_smiling_face:

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