I really hate some people, but when i look into it, i realise that IM ALSO like that. So do i just hate myself? Well ya no ■■■■ i guess
Some people talk with high pitch voices, and it pisses my off. But when im around people i like, but not close to, i also talk in a higher pitch
I HATE this guy who just LOVESS his ideas and wants to force it upon others. Yet sometimes i catch myself about to do the same
I hate ugly people but im not even that good looking myself, so im just making fun of myself
You get the point and also i hate when people talk like they are in the centre of the world, but rn like im writing the same way
I dont even know what i shld do withthis information, shld i start changing my entire being and see if it makes me happier, or should i learn to “accept, love myself mwahhhh”
sometimes i hate evryone
Hello @Mmmmeeow!
Sorry that I took awhile to get back to this, as I was away from Let’s Talk due to work exigencies.
After hearing what you shared, it is deeply frustrating (and also brutally uncomfortable) to hold up a mirror and realize the exact traits that grate on your nerves in others are the ones sneaking into your own behavior. I hear that there’s a spike of annoyance when someone forces their ideas or slips into a high pitch of voice, followed immediately by the cringe of “wait, I do that too”!
Actually it’s pretty good that you’re noticing this in the first instance. Personally, I feel that it isn’t proof that you’re a hypocrite or that you’re destined to hate yourself forever. It’s actually a very human emotion to react most strongly to flaws in others when they mirror our own insecurities, habits, or social anxieties. Admitting that out loud takes a rare level of raw honesty, even if the realization feels like a punch in the gut right now.
TBVH, you definitely don’t need to burn your entire personality to the ground, nor do you have to force yourself into a performative “accept and love every part of myself” mindset. The middle ground is usually where you can get a sense of emotional balance.
For example, simple mindful awareness paired with a little breathing room. Catching yourself in these moments means you likely have a good insight, and insight gives you agency. Instead of using that self-awareness as a stick to beat yourself up with, try treating it like a soft reminder that everyone (including you!) is just trying to navigate being a messy, imperfect human. Giving yourself a bit of grace when you catch your own high pitch or self-centered monologue usually makes it a whole lot easier to tolerate everyone else doing it, too.
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