I'm feeling really uncertain about next year

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I’ve been feeling really uncomfortable and uncertain about my future and what I’m doing with myself in the future so I feel like I’m going to write it down

Honestly,being older means having a more clarity with time,its like the older you get the more you understand how you don’t have a lot of time.For me,it’s knowing that maybe around 5 or 6 years I’m going to have to start confirming what job occupation I want to to do,what route I’m going to and what I want to do.But honestly,I don’t know.I used to think I know what I want to do.To be a chinese teacher.But ever since I started to take higher Chinese and getting some ■■■■■■ grade for it I start to wonder do I really want to be a Chinese teacher or was it cause it used to be the only subject I was good at.And do I really want to be a teacher?Do I want the rest of my life to just be about teaching students everyday,teaching them things and coming back late at night thinking what to teach them tomorrow.It just doesn’t feel like the kind of thing I want to do.But if I don’t want to do this,what do I want to do?Everyone around me seems to have agree with me that I should be a Chinese teacher that I start to wonder what other stuff can I be.And I know that I have to hurry decide because next year,I have to start filing in my application form for my course and that is when I finalize my course and what career I want to take.And honestly,having to decide what I want to do next year is daunting af

And deciding what I want to do is not the most scary part,it’s my o-lvl.This is like my 2nd formal exam,the one where everyone says if you screw up,you screw up for whole life.And thinking that I have to take that exam next year is scary as hell.Because what do you mean I have to sit for a exam that is testing my whole entire 4 years worth of learning.And I probably only have 6 or 7 months to prepare it is just really really pressuring.And I have this friend,she is like really a hardcore study person.Even during the holidays,she will study until 3am,and every time I think of that fact and the fact that I’m just lying on my couch watching shows just gives me anxiety.It’s the feeling that everyone is moving forward and I’m just still standing on the spot not knowing what to do.And I’m just really scared for this o-lvl,because this time I’m not fighting against my school,I’m fighting the whole goddam country with people who I know are smart af.And my first o-lvl(because I take Design and Technology,and the topic will come out early is on February for students to design a product over 22 weeks).So that means I have to cope with my first o-lvl,take care of my CCA stuff and deal with my portfolio and prepare for my o-lvl and prelim.I really don’t know how I will cope with these and I genuinely see myself crashing out next year(which is really surprising because I know I usually don’t crash out)

but yea,2026 is really not looking for me

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Hey @stars ,

Thank you so much for sharing your worries on this platform. I hear that you’re worried about your O levels that you’re taking next year and whether you’ll be able to cope and do well for it, and that you’re also worried of your future. It’s understandable that you’ll feel worried and uncertain. After all, it’s a big thing to decide what you’ll be doing for the rest of your life and also when having to do a national exam.

I would like to let you know that it’s normal to feel this way. I’m sure that everyone else doing O levels next year feels the same way as you, and are probably worried for their future too. I remember me and my friends were really stressed and worried too during our O levels year. We all wanted to do well, and had the thoughts of “what if I can’t get into the school that I want?”. It was really stressful, but in the end, we managed to find our own ways to handle the stress, cope and work hard to achieve our goals. And I think that you will too. Sometimes we tend to underestimate ourselves, but when the going gets tough, we’ll sometimes surprise ourselves in what we’re able to do. And I think you’ll be able to as well :slightly_smiling_face: It’s normal to compare ourselves to others, but do not let that discourage you from your goals. Focus on yourself and do your best! After all, everyone is running their own race and at their own pace. And if the worse happens and you did badly for your O levels, you can always retake it as a private candidate. It’s not the end.

Next, with regards to deciding your future course, I think maybe one thing you could do to determine whether being a Chinese teacher is what you want to do is to find a part-time job in teaching. Maybe it’ll give you some clarity if being a Chinese teacher is right for you. Additionally, I would suggest keeping an open mind too. Maybe you’ll find something more suitable as to what you want to do in the future. You’ll never know what the future holds.

All the best for the coming year :flexed_biceps: And if things get stressful, you can always reach out to us on this platform! We are here for you :heart: