i'm puzzled..

Ask a Therapist Is This Normal?
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i have been feeling that i am becoming less capable of managing my stresses and my mental health is spiralling but i am also not sure if i deserve to seek help. a part of me thinks that it’s something everyone will go through at some point in their life and i am no special.

a huge part of my stress comes from academics. due to this stress that feels never-ending yet keeps piling, it has made me feel incompetent and horrible about myself. it also doesn’t help that i am unable to properly express my feelings. over the years i have conditioned myself to not express any feelings, and now i think i am just numb. Many times i was hoping i could cry & feel better after however i just can’t - no matter how badly i want to. when i can’t express myself somehow i start feeling it in my body like chest tightness and i get so frustrated because it’s trapped in my body. to make it worse, recently i am starting to experience episodes where i would suddenly become breathless along with some worry that i just cannot seem to figure out what is it.

I also hate night time now, because its always at night that i suffer most with my thoughts. on some days i do feel that i am better off dead. i am introverted and get very anxious, so while i have few friends i also stopped socialising. i really don’t know what to do, i feel like giving up yet at the same time i do not have the courage to.

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Hi @abcded
I strongly believe that you do deserve help. I think it’s a common myth and misconception that you only seek help if you’re at wit’s ends but a lot of times working on issues early can help prevent the issues to spiral even futher out of control. Everyone deserves for their issues and struggles to be validated and not dismissed as trivial/ not important.

I hope this gives you a little nudge to want to see help, I wish you well and do let us know if you do decide to seek help/ require some resources on where to seek help.

Take care!

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Hi @abcded

Thank you for sharing your feelings with us, I appreciate your willingness to be vulnerable with us on this platform. It certainly takes a lot of courage, and I commend you for that.

Firstly, I’m truly sorry to hear that you’re experiencing such a difficult time, and again, I appreciate your courage in reaching out. It’s entirely okay to seek help, and you absolutely deserve support. I want to affirm you, your feelings are valid, and we are here to support you.

It sounds like you’re having a very tough time managing your studies and also not being able to regulate or express your emotions well, and I can tell that it’s difficult for you to even cry at this point because you feel numb. I can imagine that these feelings are stuck within you, and it makes sense to feel frustrated because of this stuckness.

I also can understand how the night time causes you to become more anxious, especially with your thoughts. I am so sorry to hear that it’s been so tough for you and it’s almost unbearable.

I’m just wondering, have you considered talking to someone you trust about what you’re going through? It could be a friend, family member, or someone else you feel comfortable confiding in. Additionally, have you thought about seeking professional help, perhaps from a counselor or therapist?

Given the academic stress you’re facing, I suggest breaking down tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. This might help alleviate the feeling of being overwhelmed. Also, incorporating relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing or mindfulness, could be beneficial for managing stress and the physical symptoms you’ve described.

I hope that you would also try to reach out for help especially with the regulation of emotions, it will be great if you could approach a counsellor to process these emotions together. You could either try to talk to a professional near you (Family Service Centre) or try an online option here:

Limitless : Talk To Someone - Limitless
CPH chat : https://www.cphonlinecounselling.sg/hc/en-us
IMH CHAT : Home - CHAT
ec2.sg : https://fycs.org/ec2-sg

Last but not least, please do continue to be kind to yourself. It really isn’t easy juggling so many things at a time and not being able to feel, but I know that you’re hanging on - this is a sign of strength, and I hope you will continue to be compassionate with yourself.

Please do update us on how you’re doing and if you’ve managed to speak to a counsellor. Hear from you soon.

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hey, been some time since this post and a lot has changed, not exactly for the better but at least I have finally mustered enough courage to seek help :smiling_face_with_tear: I will be meeting with a counsellor soon and just the thought of it makes me so nervous i’m hoping i won’t bail out at the last minute :cold_face: anyway, thank you so much for reading & validating my struggles. I truly appreciate it :slightly_smiling_face:

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