I’ve been friends with her since p5 I’m now sec 2, since last year she has been going through depression and self harming with regular attempts. And I’ve always felt like I put in more effort into our friendship than she does but ofc I understand that maybe she doesn’t have energy or motivation or maybe it’s cuz of me. But like we could honestly go a months without talking at all if I don’t text her first like I’m always the one who has to text her first or like call her. So I thought it’s ok maybe she needs some rest or she doesn’t feel like talking to people but then I see her matching pfps with her other friends and like texting them often when I’m hanging out with her. And you could say I’m jealous I guess cuz that would make sense but idk it’s just kinda hurts when I see her talking and doing stuff with other people when I have to like text her or ask her first like actually last time we used to match pfp for a long time but after a while she said she didn’t want to anymore because she wanted to choose her own pfps and I understood that so ofc I let her but now I see her matching with her other friends. Like ik this is so stupid but it’s sad to know I’m not her number 1 I’m pretty sure I’m not even close and it’s worse because I do have other friends that I’m close with but I just don’t have someone I can actually talk to about this kinda stuff and I actually feel so alone