Rant about being undiagnosed.. possibly having social anxiety?

I’m so tired… It’s been stressful for me ever since I’ve become more conscious of my mental health. I think i’m suffering from some anxiety, specifically social anxiety but I’ve never been officially diagnosed… and whenever I try to bring up the topic to my parents they’ll just call me dramatic. All they’ll tell me to do is pray and look forward to God’s plans or stuff… but it honestly never helps… I realise I need professional help, not to brag about being diagnosed, but to have people to realise and know my problems. I’m tired of comments from teachers like “stop acting shy”, “build up your confidence”, “speak up” when it’s honestly so ■■■■■■■ hard for me to. I’m tired of adults telling me ■■■■ to do as if it’s easy. I want to have friends and be confortable around people but it’s so hard… and I hate myself for not trying hard enough. I feel lonely, I’m jealous seeing people hanging out with their friends, I’m tired of mentally pushing myself to interact more and not do it in the end. Everyday, I think about dying… weirdly I imagine different scenarios of a car to hit me or a fatal accident… but i’ve never got the dedication to actually physically hurt myself.

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Hey! Thank you for sharing how you are feeling here! How are you coping so far? Having had similar experiences before, I understand where you are coming from. Parents are typically more avoidant in scenarios when it comes to issues they are unfamiliar with. Would be good if you could find a trusted adult who you can share your thoughts and feelings with.

Be comfortable with who you are and take small steps as you deem fit. Don’t be pressured by society to be someone who you are not! Make friends at your own pace and interact with people when you have the social battery to do so. I am sure you are doing your best at where you are at.

I would suggest seeking your school counselor or a trusted adult to share your thoughts or feelings, or feel free to continue the conversation here!

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Thank you… honestly i’ve been looking forward to trying to reach the school councellor but i never really have the confidence to, but i’ll try when I can. And honestly, i’ve been more tired, eoy exams are coming soon… i havent reallu got a grasp in the subjects, burnout and completely lost motivation to study. I’m honestly anxious to talk to someone facetoface so sharing like this is more comfortable for me

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Glad you’re finding this community a safe space for you to share, @Emelisa. We’ll continue to be here to listen and support you along the way.

I think many of us here are probably introverts so we would feel anxious at times when we have to interact. I feel the same way as well and sometimes would really prefer not to talk if I could.

What’s worrying is if these symptoms last for a long time and if it starts to affect your day-to-day activities. Being in this state of uncertainty (about your condition) can also bring about additional stress. If you’d want a better and more definitive answer to what you’re facing, whether it’s a case of social anxiety or other issues then it’ll be best to speak to a professional. If you’re afraid to speak to a school counselor, there are also other community options out there that you could try (eg Limitless, iASH.sg)

Let us know how it goes! I hope you’ll recover soon from these feelings of anxiety and burnout. We’re rooting for you.

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Hi @Emelisa

Firstly, thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us here on the platform, it takes so much courage to be vulnerable and authentic and I commend you for that. I’m so sorry for taking such a long time to respond, I hope you understand that we’re trying to go through each post on the forum and it takes a bit of time. I’m here now and I would like to respond to your post :slight_smile:

Secondly, I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through such a tough time. It takes a lot of strength to open up about your feelings, especially when it’s met with misunderstandings from others. It’s perfectly okay to seek professional help, and I’m glad you’re considering it. Your feelings are valid, and you deserve support and understanding.

I want to affirm you - it’s completely normal to struggle with anxiety, especially social anxiety. I can also understand that dealing with comments from teachers and the pressure to “just be confident” can be incredibly frustrating. It’s not easy, and it’s not your fault. You’re doing your best, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.

I want to encourage you to be kind and compassionate to yourself. In this world, there’s only one you - whatever that you’ve gone through in your life, you made it through and you’re here now still surviving and still alive, and that’s something that takes tremendous strength. So please, do be kind to yourself :slight_smile: I encourage you to try out this resource and learn how to be kind to yourself - Mental Support & Wellbeing Resources in Singapore to Improve Your Mental Health | mindline.sg

I also want to affirm you that feeling lonely and jealous of others is a common experience, but it’s important to remember that social anxiety can distort our perception of how others view us. You’re not alone in wanting to make friends and feel comfortable around people and your feelings of wanting to connect are entirely valid. Perhaps when you feel drained about interacting with others, you can try to speak positively to yourself instead of hating yourself. The way we speak to ourselves affects us internally, and our words impact our lives. I encourage you to try out this activity as well, especially when you need to replace those negative thoughts and challenge them with positive ones: Mental Support & Wellbeing Resources in Singapore to Improve Your Mental Health | mindline.sg

The thoughts you’re having about harming yourself are concerning, and I want you to know that you don’t have to go through this alone. It’s important for you to talk to a mental health professional or a trusted adult about these thoughts. There are online options for you to speak to professionals about your feelings, and I highly encourage you to give it a try:

  1. Limitless : Talk To Someone - Limitless
  2. CPH chat : https://www.cphonlinecounselling.sg/hc/en-us
  3. IMH CHAT : https://www.imh.com.sg/CHAT/Pages/default.aspx
  4. ec2.sg : https://fycs.org/ec2-sg

However if things ever do get overwhelming, please reach out to a crisis hotlines:

Last but not least, I really commend you for taking this significant step in sharing your feelings here, and that shows your strength and resilience. I hope you will take a step forward by speaking to someone online since you are uncomfortable with face-to-face for now.

Do keep us posted on how it’s going for you, and how you’re coping right now.

Looking forward to hearing from you :slight_smile:

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Hi- thank you for this encouraging message. Honestly nothing much has changed but I’m slowly coping :slightly_smiling_face:

I’m glad i managed to talk to a few friends about my troubles. Socialising is still nerve-wracking for me but i’m trying to push my negative thoughts away

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