Whenever im in a new environment and someone i know is not around i feel the need to leave the whole situation or the strong urge to start crying. Im terribly unable to adapt to new environments and whenever put in one, i react terrible, it takes out all the energy in me. I recently started out in a new school and I reacted to it so bad, i ended up not going after the first day. Whenever people are harsh with me it affects me for days and the feelings causes me stomach pains. I find it terribly hard to accept new things and whenever i need to prepare myself to go into a new environment, i find myslef crying a lot and unable to stop thinking about it. I also begin to miss my home and basically get home sick. I had seperation anxiety with my parents when i was younger, but it has been 7 years and I suddenly feel it all come back after the first day of school. I don’t even understand whats wrong with me.
Hi @jan1
I understand how you feel because I also struggle with adapting.
I’m so used to a sense of familiarity, and whenever it’s not there, I tend to cry a lot and hide myself (e.g., skipping school when I was younger).
However, I think what really helps is giving myself time. I find that after a while, it gets a bit easier as I adjust to this “new life.” Making new friends in school also helps a bit! Have you tried making new friends?
Also, are you currently studying abroad, outside your hometown?
Im studying in the same country, but its a lot further compared to my previous school which makes me really nervouse as i dislike being so far away from my house and my parents.
Hihi i feel u, im like that too. When my office got renovations i was a nervous wreck too.
Have u heard abt being Highly sensitive? Hsp, there are some resources for how to cope out there. I def dun adapt fast too
Um do u miss home coz u staying at hostel?
Nope i still come back home at night and im not stating in a hostel, its just really far from my house. Also its comforting to see that i am not the only one that feels this way🙏
@jan1 I see. Then its good u can still go home after. Do u know abt Hsp Highly sensitive? Try to google it
Ah will definitely check that outt thank youu
Hi firstly thank you for sharing it’s not easy being in a new environment for sure and scary too. It’s definitely okay to feel scared and cry about it, honestly speaking, being in a new environment scares me as well (I’m actually in another country on my own for a semester too so I can relate with some of what you said) so you are not alone in feeling that way okay!
Adapting to a new environment takes a lot of time and effort and it’s okay if you need more time to get used to the environment and the people there, so there’s really nothing wrong with you for feeling this way! Sometimes I too cry about being so far away from home and the people I know, I try to journal or go for a walk but I think the time and space for myself was what helped me best and trying to go for events/activities that I was interested in so that hopefully I could meet people with similar interests and make some friends to make the experience less scary.
I hope school has been better for you lately though! Do let us know if you would like to talk more about how you feel because your feelings are valid and important too and you should never feel bad about feeling this way!
thank you for sharing with us such a valuable piece of information that is so precious to you! i hope you’ve been coping better over the past month, and sending my love and well wishes to you! and i definitely relate to this…i’ve been switching between new environments because of my parent’s jobs and thus sometimes it feels that i always leave a part of myself in every place, and then feel lost when i enter a new one – so i completely understand how you feel! right now i’m living separately from my family, and it does feel empty and lonely without them sometimes. be reassured that there’s nothing wrong with you, i believe its human nature to feel this way – if a good cry helps to release the weight on your shoulders, then let it all out!! adapting to new environments takes time, so give yourself the space to feel the emotions, but you could try to take captive of the negative thoughts that might overwhelm you. you are brave and courageous for always having to go outside of your comfort zone, i am so proud of you, and i hope you can feel the same way about yourself too:,)
@sunrize Oh which country are u at for uni? how long is a semester?
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Hi @jan1,
It sounds like you’re going through an incredibly tough time, and I want to acknowledge the strength it takes to share how you’re feeling. Adapting to new environments can be overwhelming, especially when it stirs up such intense emotions and physical discomfort. It’s completely valid to feel this way—you’re not alone in struggling with change, and it’s okay to find it hard. Your experiences of separation anxiety in the past and the strong emotional ties you have to familiar spaces and people suggest you’ve been carrying this deep sensitivity for a long time, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Being sensitive to your surroundings and the behavior of others is part of who you are, and while it may feel like a challenge right now, it’s also a reflection of how deeply you care.
Starting a new school or any significant life change can shake up your sense of security, and it makes perfect sense that it feels exhausting and overwhelming. You’re dealing with a lot emotionally, and it’s important to be kind to yourself during this time. Seeking support from someone you trust—whether it’s a family member, friend, or counselor—might help ease the weight of these feelings. Remember, it’s okay to take small steps at your own pace. You don’t need to force yourself into big changes all at once. Maybe try focusing on just one small, comforting element of the new environment, like a kind face, a safe spot, or even a routine that feels familiar. You deserve compassion, especially from yourself, as you navigate these challenges. Be gentle with yourself—you’re doing your best.