I have a lot going on in my family right now. Debt, moving, my grandpa paralysing and my aunt getting pneumonia. But i feel like I’ve grown so numb to all of this. I’m also always taught to be “strong”. There was a time where i saw my step dad abusing my mom and i cried. I remember she walked to my room opened the door and yelled at me “IT’S A PROBLEM BETWEEN ME AND HIM WHY ARE YOU CRYING?? YOU SHOULD BE STRONG” that’s not the first there has been many occasions and requirements where i have to be the strong one even if i was as young as 7. My mom also always refers to me as “strong” like she said to my niece where "you should be strong and overcome these things. In reality I’m anything but strong. It’s just feels weird and i have like days where I feel completely utterly ■■■■. I would also go to as far taking my own life. But there’s always something/someone saving me. I obviously can’t tell all of this to anyone in my family as they’re already going through a lot. So yeah i guess take this as vent.
Hi @user0574, thank you so much for sharing this, I can really feel how much you’ve been holding in for so long. It sounds like you’ve had to grow up way too fast, always being told to be “strong” even when you were just a kid needing comfort and safety yourself. That’s such a heavy burden to carry alone.
Being called “strong” all the time can feel like a trap, like you’re not allowed to break or feel or be human. But you are allowed to feel overwhelmed. What you’re going through, family issues, violence, illness, emotional neglect, it’s a lot. And feeling numb or breaking down sometimes doesn’t make you weak, it just means you’re human, doing your best under impossible pressure.
You don’t have to earn the right to be heard by being okay all the time. I’m really glad you’re still here, even when things have felt hopeless. That says so much about your resilience even if you don’t feel it right now 
.
If you’re ever close to that edge again, please try to talk to someone, a friend, teacher, counselor, or even come on here. You shouldn’t have to carry this all by yourself.
You deserve space to feel, to be taken care of, and to heal, not just survive. You’re not alone in this, and your feelings really matter 
Thank you so much for sharing this. It takes a lot of courage to open up about something so personal and heavy. What you’ve been through, especially being expected to be “strong” from such a young age in the midst of family pain and trauma, is incredibly hard and unfair. It’s completely understandable to feel numb or overwhelmed, and that “strong” label doesn’t mean you have to carry all that weight alone or never feel broken. Being strong doesn’t mean never struggling; it means you’re still here, even on the hardest days, and that’s real strength too.
You don’t have to hide your feelings just because others are hurting too. You deserve space to feel, to rest, and to be cared for. It’s also really important to find someone safe outside your family to talk to, whether that’s a counselor, therapist, or a support group, where you can be honest without fear of judgment or burdening others.
If you want, I’m here to listen anytime you need to vent or talk through things. You don’t have to carry this by yourself.
Dear @user0574
Thank you for courageously writing in and sharing your experience. It is concerning that you have been carrying a huge burden for a long time
Please know that what you are feeling is fully understandable and completely valid. I believe you are feeling numb as a way to protect yourself from further hurt and overwhelm.
May I encourage you to please approach a trusted adult such as a school teacher or school counsellor for support with some urgency. You fully deserve this care and support.
May I also encourage you to contact the national mindline at 1771 if you prefer immediate support. This national mindline 1771 provides a safe space where individuals can seek help without fear of stigma. All conversations are kept confidential, and helpseekers can choose to remain anonymous making it easier for individuals to take the first step towards getting help early. You can reach for immediate help by three main methods:
-Telephone hotline by dialling 1771;
-Mobile messaging service via WhatsApp at +65-6669-1771; and
-Online webchat through the chat widget hosted on mindline.sg website mindline.sg | First Stop for Mental Health Support in Singapore
Please know that feeling like you want to end your life is serious, and it deserves immediate attention and care.Even if you feel like your family has too much on their plate, you are allowed to need support. Reaching out doesn’t make you weak, it’s actually the strongest thing you can do. Please take the first step towards seeking help soonest. You are not alone.
Hi @user0574
First of all, it takes a lot of courage to be able to admit these things, so thank you so much for coming forward with this. Second, I want you to know that how you are feeling is completely valid and understandable given the experience you have described.
It sounds like you have been in an environment where you haven’t been given a space to express your feelings for a long time. Being called “strong” repeatedly can make you suppress your feelings and put on a facade. But that doesn’t mean they are completely gone. Sometimes numbness is your mind’s way of protecting you from a pain too big to face all at once.
It’s also understandable that being told to “be strong” has left you feeling unseen. You’ve been hurting, and instead of comfort, you were told to hide your feelings. That can make it really hard to reach out, even when you need support. But you don’t have to carry all of this alone. Even if your family is going through a lot, you still matter, and you’re allowed to have space for your own pain. You deserve to be heard and feel all the emotions you want to feel.
But if it gets to a point where taking your own life feels like a good option, may I ask you to please reach out to professionals who can help support you during difficult times. There are many support channels like telephone hotlines, online chats, and this website that can help you.
Please know that you are not alone and there are many people who love you. If you need to vent again or if you simply need any comfort. 