i just got back my end of year exams papers and i already failed 4 out of 8 subjects which is really bad rn cus im in sec 3 and nxt yr is o lvl and importnat. yesterday i already toldmy mom about some of the subjects, only including one that ive failed-amath. ive alwsy been weak at that and got tuition for it in the mid terms. when i got my marks for amath back honestly i wasnt very surprised but rather ok with it. 33/90 i felt that this was the best i could do excluding some carelessness in there. when i told my mom about it that i was pretty produ that i imporved she said," gosh how bad was ur previous ones?" it was something like that. and i jsut instantly felt so bad.i knew it was very bad. her expectations are at least a B and all my subjects are falling under D to C. its so stressful to think about it when my feelings are crushed. i just wonder why wont she say something more encouragin to me rather than comparing me to other people or telling me ways to solve the isue etc. i DO infact know how to solve and sometimes just lazy/procrastinates but i do just want to get some positive things uk. i hate comparison.i m me, not them/?? i cant be them?! i havent told her any results today and i have to tell tmr cus its last day of checkign scripts. i honeslty dont know what i should even do now. if i tell her i failed 4 subjects shes gonna freak out so bad. go on and on about how im going to have national exams and still slacking off getting fails everywheere.im scared to say. i feel ive lost her trust already as this happen so many times and i tell her after i will be studying nd putting in more effort. yes i do put in more effort after but slowly it goes somewhat back again.i feel so sick. and like i dont get life. its like a never ending cycle. when u growup ure stuck with learingn and study8ing to get a better work and future. when at that stage that u work, just working for money to svare up for when ure older. sure there are some happiness in between those periods but its so boring no? its literally the same thing in life,how different can things be. its so useles to me. ok end of my vent im not ready for tmr. ill be sobbing real bad, losing allmy motivation and be stuck on prepsring fornxt yr this holiday.
I really feel you, it’s the same for me too, like who wouldn’t want to just rest instead of studying so hard. But one way for me is that I go find people to study with to motivate myself and stop procrastinating.It’s okay that you did not do well this time,the good thing is that you made improvement,just take this time and think of new strategies and take a break for a while,next year will always be a better year,jiayou!!
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