Lately, I had to talk with them about not being with me when I needed them the most, being at my lowest and stressing the hell out because of moving out and changing my life completely for the 3st time in just half of a year.
They told me I was just mentally ill and they don’t think that my feelings are worthy of support, because I’m being irrational and whiny.
Is that…Normal? Are they right for doing so? And even if I was ill like they said, is that enough of a reason to ditch me then I needed them?
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i think that no one owes you anything if you are mentally ill. i did lose a lot of frens from my years of depression n anxiety disorder. I think its best to run thru your problems in ur head with a professional counsellor or therapist or chatgpt. I do ask my frens w mental health problems for help b4 but i try to keep it low
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Hi Doodlenoodle,
I can imagine how upsetting it is to notice that your friends moved away from you at the time when you needed them the most. And what makes it worse was them telling you that you were “irrational and whiny” , and your “feelings are not worth of support”. I am sorry that you feel heartbroken. As you are reading this chat, try to also relax your mind by carrying out some breathing activity through this link : mindline.sg | Free Mental Health Resources & Mindfulness Tools in Singapore
Everyone has their own beliefs about what is right or wrong, and act according to that. I hear that you were going through some changes in your life and these experiences probably have put you in a state of emotional turmoil. However, all these emotional disturbances were happening inside you and people couldn’t see nor feel/understand those experiences. Besides, everyone might have their own sets of issues that they are struggling with, and thus have no knowledge and capacity to support/ empathise with you. In addition, emotional distress can cause others to feel uncomfortable or stressful if they don’t know how to regulate their emotions. Thus, these might be some of the reasons why your friends couldn’t stand by you when you were in distress. Anyway, your friends did not ditch you, but they may be just unable to support your “ whiny and irrational behaviours”. If you happened to get overwhelmed frequently and not knowing how to regulate and keep yourself calm, you may perhaps want to consider seeking support from a counsellor. You will find that learning how to regulate your emotions will make you less “whiny and emotional dependent” on others.
Meanwhile, you may explore more emotional regulation methods in the Mindline website and see if you can find any method helpful to you.
Hope my sharing helps. Take care.
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