Counting down the days

Hangouts Rants
1

So I just submitted the wrong work file and slides for a class assessment - graded work that I could have gotten an A for and because of my dumb mistake I literally will lose that A. I don’t think my lecturer would let me off as he had given us 4 days to submit this work, while doing that I was busy with another module submission for the past 2 days.

I did check my work again and again and again… Just to mess up like this. I’m so upset because this subject is the one that I’m expected to score an A in but my time management is so bad and I’m so sleep deprived and tired of doing this anymore. Like I would literally take 2+ hours just to left align text in adobe illustrator because I’m a freaking perfectionist and it’s killing me. I haven’t slept for the past year it feels like, and the year is already ending.

I can’t think of new ideas anymore and while others can submit their work in class within the time allocated, I take 3 working days just to come up with some decent. Graphic design was supposed to be my strength and it’s the only thing I’m decent at and I’ve been failing in that. I’ve started to hate doing design and wished I went for a more conventional course. So since I’m not doing any good anymore… I’m not particularly good at anything that can support myself in the future. I’m just counting my days till I die at this point.

Been living in fear of being compared, in fear of not being good enough, in fear of being judged that I can’t even go out on my own. At least if I’m this dumb, I wished I looked pretty but I’m not. I tried to stop being so self aware of my ugly side but I can’t help it, I feel terrible.

Everytime something is going too well, I mess up one way or another. I don’t want to keep living anymore. How do I handle this time management issue, it’s so bad I’m actually going to kill myself. I wish I could just pass on when I’m sleeping.

2

Let ai do most of the work

3

Hi @justme,

First, I want to thank you for opening up about how you’re feeling—it takes courage to share so honestly. I can hear how much pressure you’ve been carrying, how diligently you’ve been working, and how deeply this mistake has impacted you. You’ve been holding yourself to incredibly high standards, and it’s clear that you care a lot about your work and your future.

Let’s start with this: making a mistake does not mean you are a failure. It doesn’t mean you’re “dumb” or “not good enough.” It means you’re human. Even the most talented people make mistakes, and it’s part of learning and growing. This one mistake doesn’t erase all the effort and passion you’ve poured into your work.

It sounds like perfectionism has been weighing on you. You’re putting so much pressure on yourself to get everything “just right” that it’s taking a toll on your health and happiness. Not getting perfect doesn’t mean you’re failing; it means you care so much about doing well that it’s become overwhelming.

You mentioned time management as a challenge, and it’s something we can absolutely work on. But first, it’s important to address the bigger picture: you deserve kindness—from others and from yourself. Let’s take small steps toward self-compassion and balance:

  • When things go wrong, remind yourself of your strengths. This mistake doesn’t define your abilities. You’re creative, driven, and hardworking. Don’t let one slip-up overshadow all that you’ve accomplished.
  • Break tasks into manageable chunks. For example, instead of aiming for “perfectly polished slides,” focus on just completing one slide at a time, giving yourself permission to stop when it’s “good enough.”
  • Take care of your energy. Sleep, nutrition, and breaks are not luxuries—they’re necessities. You’ve been running on empty, and rest will help you recharge and feel more in control.
  • Reach out for support. Talk to someone you trust, whether it’s a teacher, friend, or counselor. You don’t have to carry this alone, and others want to help you.

Your feelings are valid, and they’re a signal that you’re under immense pressure. But you are not alone, and there’s a way forward. If the thoughts about wanting to “pass on” become overwhelming, please, please talk to someone immediately—whether it’s a hotline or a trusted adult. You matter so much more than any grade or project, and your future holds possibilities you can’t see yet.

For now, let’s focus on what’s in front of us: what’s one thing you can do today, just for you, to feel a little lighter? It could be something as simple as stepping outside, listening to your favorite song, or even just taking a deep breath and reminding yourself, “I’m doing my best, and that’s enough.”

We are. here to support you. Let us know how you’re feeling after reading this—we’d love to hear what’s on your mind. :blush:

4

Subject: A Reminder on Empathy and Support

Hi @user1138 , I hope this message finds you well. I wanted to take a moment to address a recent interaction in our peer support community. I noticed your response to @justme regarding their feelings of distress. While I understand that discussions about mental health can sometimes prompt a range of reactions, I believe it’s crucial for us to approach these conversations with empathy and kindness.

When someone shares their thoughts or feelings around such sensitive topics as suicidal thoughts, it’s important for us to provide support that acknowledges their emotional pain and encourages open dialogue. Responses like “let AI do most of the work” can come off as dismissive, which may not offer the comfort or understanding that someone in crisis really needs.

Let’s strive to create a space where everyone feels safe and supported. Your contributions are valuable, and I’d love to see us all focus on fostering an atmosphere of compassion and understanding. Thank you for considering this perspective.

Best regards,
Danial
Befriender, Let’s Talk

1 Like
5

Interesting take, can you share more what you mean?
I actually have friends who uses ChatGPT for emotional support. Or are you referring to using AI to actually do the graded work? Not sure about how that would be graded tho haha
Personally I really find AI useful in giving me some structure and new ideas when I’ve got no ideas or confusing ideas in my mind, and ChatGPT can help give me some clarity, good stuff indeed hehe
But yes pls share more of what you mean about using AI do most of the work!! :hugs:

1 Like
6

Mann I feel its really hard on you feeling how you’re feeling now :frowning:
I’m also learning slowly, to be kinder to myself… I realise we all make all sorts of mistakes in all ways we dont always see people around us making but we really tunnel into our own mistakes with extreme pressures ><
Just wanna say from what you shared, I hear that you are really quite tired out, so that may be why it feels tougher and tougher and more mistakes seem to be happening. Sooo rmb to breathe and give yourself rest mentally okie!!
And when it comes limited time and excessive perfectionism, man oh man, the struggle is reaal. I dont have much tricks or tips to share, but maybe before starting on a task, can try evaluating how much time and energy you have, what is your goal here (maybe its just to be able to complete a submission heh), then set a realistic expectation at the start that you will be okay with some flaws? Otherwise I know how it feels starting without an expectation and then fussing over every details (ugh)
Idk man, what are some things you actively attempt to make the best of your situation? :thinking: :people_hugging:

1 Like
7

i meant work, let it suggest the structure/skeleton and slowly use it to fill up the parts of it. your role is like the editor, curator etc

8

agree agree!! hehe ai can help make our lives abit easier~~

9

how r u managing ur school work n mental health now? feel free to talk. was in design courses n recovered from suicidal thoughts

10

(post deleted by author)

11

honestly, my mental health would probably never get better, I’m really stuck in the pessimistic mindset and somehow anxious 24/7 even crossing roads stress me out lol. I havent had any diagnosis or anything. I’ve been coping by just gaslighting myself that I’m happy.

And classes has been the usual I guess, I am very much regretting design I feel like my future is bleak. I wished I did what the younger me wanted, but I was and am still so timid til this day. Also about the assignment in the original post, I was stressed for nothing bcs I still got the grade I wanted. The lecturer’s feedbacks literally stressed me out so badly just to give everyone an A. Like he told me it was only given to a few students, there was a student’s work which he showed to be the benchmark for an A and it was really well done like a professional and that we needed to do it of that level to get an A. I guess I was too gullible. Not saying that the rest didnt put in effort at all but some only did the bare minimum and got it.

Hahaha I don’t know what to think anymore, is it even worth it to put in so much effort? Oh. If you don’t mind sharing, how did you recover from it? thank you.

12

(post deleted by author)

13

Reach out to ur school counsellor for ur negative n anxious thoughts. Therapist would be even better.
What course did the younger i wanted?
Design courses grading system is weird cuz it is partly artistic, sometimes no logic n its according to the taste n beliefs of the lecturer.
Depends on what r ur goals.
Therapy, create lists for gratitude, things n food i like, passion, interests, meaning, coping mechanisms n keep them w me in my phone to read when i need. cardio, eat nutritiously, socialise n have a support system

14

I actually did have a school counsellor everytime I changed schools, and I still do now. so about the cardio and eating nutritionally, I’m not so good in that aspect either. It’s difficult for me to even go out and order food, I feel like I’m being watched. Eating well and exercising comes together right? I tried doing that before and became obsessive with tracking my weight and ate probably too much food just to gain weight. Then I stopped altogether. I guess dont know what a healthy routine is, I do search about it online but there is so many different ones its so confusing. I’ll try doing the listing down things though- I’m unsure if I have any other passions.

15

Afraid of eating out sounds like some form of social anxiety that u should bring up to a professional? Same with the eating n exercise. I cant really help u w that. For passion wise, its just a matter of looking around n trying stuff until something sticks. That applies for everything tbh

16

mm I know, I probably should have seeked help from a professional a long time ago but thanks for the suggestions, I’ll keep them in mind.

17

Keep in touch. I can hang out n chat w u if u need more exposure to public spaces