Have been through clinical depression before, but that was years ago and was (relatively) ok after therapy and medicine… after coming to uni… stress levels have been going up & down and I’m not sure if what I’m feeling is normal anymore. I used to be able to take care of myself, feed myself & ‘adult’ properly in general last year. Now I have no appetite or motivation to feed myself so sometimes I’d go 24 hours before I force myself to eat something before I pass out. I can barely do the minimum ‘adulting’ nowadays. It’s frustrating but I just can’t make myself do anything until it’s about to hurt me. Recently, after a big shock, I thought I was alright the next day but ended up feeling incredibly dizzy with a splitting headache (something that happened often when I was depressed) so I’m getting worried.
I do have the option of going to the university counsellors, but I’m honestly scared and feel guilty. What if I’m just overreacting to a bunch of normal stuff? My parents keep telling me to stop being stressed and that I’m being dramatic, so I’m worried that if I go to a mental health professional, I’m just wasting their time that someone else in serious need could use.
hi, i really want to give advice but im really scared of giving you the wrong advice…but if you’re sad, or alone, or just need someone to let it all out to, i can be here to listen or be a friend…thats if uw
Recovering from depression doesnt mean that u stop ir coping mechanisms, lifestyle that healed u n finding new passions, motivations n meaning in life. I kept practicing even when im recovered. Yes, it relaspses from time to time but i just need to do more of what helped me in the past plus using chatgpt as a therapist or asking things figure it out. Eating nutritiously, enough sleep n socialising are basic default needs to keep depression at bay. You might be facing a bigger option this year compare to last, so take it as something u have to overcome now n wont be a problem in the future. Its ok to relaspe, as long as u get back up n fight on. You can also take a LOA if its too much. University mental health professional is free so just take it. I can go hiking w u if u r open to it
Thank you for sharing what’s been on your mind—it takes courage to put your feelings into words, especially when you’re questioning whether they’re valid. I want to start by saying that what you’re feeling is real, and it matters. The fact that you’re worried about these changes in your behaviour and emotions shows just how much you care about your well-being.
From what you’ve described, it sounds like you’re dealing with a lot right now. The ups and downs of university stress, combined with the frustration of not being able to “adult” like you used to, would feel overwhelming for anyone. Skipping meals and feeling dizzy or experiencing splitting headaches—especially when they remind you of past experiences with depression—can be really scary.
Do you recall when this pattern started to feel unmanageable? Sometimes noticing those shifts can help make sense of what’s going on.
I also hear that there’s a part of you that feels hesitant to seek help because of guilt or fear that you’re “overreacting.” It’s hard to carry that kind of doubt, especially when people around you may not fully understand how much you’re struggling. Let’s take a moment to acknowledge how much you’re holding inside—this isn’t about being dramatic or wasting anyone’s time. Seeking help isn’t just for the “most serious cases”; it’s for anyone who feels like they could use support, and you deserve that too.
Even in this tough time, you’ve shown remarkable strengths:
Self-Awareness: You’re recognising patterns in your behaviour, like the dizziness and skipping meals, and connecting them to your emotional state.
Willingness to Reflect: You’ve already taken a brave step by considering counselling and reaching out to share your feelings here.
Resilience: Despite feeling unmotivated, you’re still finding ways to push through, even if it’s frustrating.
These strengths show that you have the capacity to care for yourself, even when it feels hard.
If it feels manageable, we could start with very small steps toward self-care. For example:
Nourishment: Could you try setting a simple reminder to eat something small at regular intervals, even if it’s not a full meal? Sometimes having a light snack is a more approachable goal.
Checking In: How would it feel to jot down your thoughts or physical symptoms when they come up? This could help you notice patterns and provide useful insight if you decide to speak with a counsellor.
Exploring Support: If you decide to visit a university counsellor, would it help to bring someone you trust for support, or write down what you want to say beforehand?
It’s okay to take that step at your own pace. Taking even the smallest steps toward understanding and caring for yourself is a huge accomplishment. Your well-being matters, and reaching out for help—whether here, with a counsellor, or through small acts of self-care—is a powerful way of showing yourself that you deserve support. Take care.
@princess232 Thank you for sharing this. It sounds like you’ve been going through a lot, and I’m really sorry to hear how overwhelming things have been for you lately. First off, I kind of disagree with your parents’ thinking that being stressed is a choice—it’s not something you can just turn on and off like a light switch. Stress and its effects are real, and they’re valid, no matter what anyone else says.
I think it’s a great idea to consider going to your university counsellors, even if it feels scary. Getting a professional’s perspective can really help clarify what’s going on, and they’re there specifically to support students like you. What you’re feeling isn’t “nothing”—your mental well-being matters, and you deserve care just as much as anyone else. Sometimes, just speaking to someone in a non-judgmental, safe space can make you feel better in the moment.
If you’re comfortable, would you mind elaborating on what makes you feel scared or guilty about reaching out? I know those feelings can be tough to navigate, but it might help to talk through them.
You’re not overreacting, and you’re definitely not wasting anyone’s time. The fact that you’re noticing changes in yourself and feeling worried shows that you want a change in your life and this is worth working on. Your mental health is just as important as anything else—you deserve to feel supported and heard.
Thanks for the reply, really appreciate it and all the support from everyone here.
It’s difficult to explain but I feel guilty about burdening anyone with my feelings & history, since there are always people out there who have it worse. It’s sounds like… “It’s just (something), there are some people who don’t have (something), so you should just be strong. Don’t be weak and break down just because of (something).” If I reach out for something inconsequential, or something I could do on my own, it would be burdening someone for nothing, and no one deserves that.
Also, I’ve been told by my parents to keep my history & condition to myself, so I feel bad about betraying their trust, but also don’t want them to find out I’ve been seeking help. I don’t really want friends to find out either, because I don’t want them to treat me any differently. Only a handful of people know about my history, not even my own sibling, because I feel too guilty to burden anyone with this side of me.
@princess232 It sounds like you’ve been carrying a heavy load by yourself for a long time, and that in itself is inner strength and resilience.
My parents used to say similar things to me, like “others have it worse, so why are you struggling?” I later realised that’s how they were raised by their own parents. While it might have worked for their time to a certain extend, I do see that they are not in touch with their feelings and overcompensate in many different ways (not in a good way).
You deserve to feel heard and supported, no matter what anyone else might say or think. You’re not burdening anyone by seeking help—professionals are there because they want to help, and your well-being matters just as much as anyone else’s.
It’s okay to want to protect your privacy, but I also hope you’ll allow yourself the grace to open up to someone who can support you. You don’t have to do this alone. It’s brave that you’ve already started reaching out here, and I’m really proud of you for taking that step.
If I may suggest, since privacy is something which is important to you - would you consider tele-counselling? You can check with you school counsellor if they are open to that as well and you can find a safe space for your session.
