Hi, I’ve actually got some questions i want to ask but I’ll start by sharing some context.
Since primary school, I’ve actually been feeling quite depressed. I used to get bullied by my peers since kindergarten and it was to the point where i either had no friends or had fake friends who gossiped about me behind my back. As i grew older, i began feeling like i wasnt loved enough by my family especially because i have no father figure and only had a mother who i actually had to care for because of her hot temper and childish behaviour at times (e.g being a really bad role model for my younger brother by drinking and smoking infront of him, being late to appointments and not caring or scolding me when i tell her to be a good role model). In P6, i began feeling extremely empty. Like i just dont feel like doing anything (idk how to describe it but its just this feeling where i dont know anything about myself including my feelings. I didnt feel happy but i also didnt rlly feel sad) and at that point in time i was undergoing alot of pressure, having tuition as soon as i got home and barely having time to relax. I soon began self harming but for some reason I hated how i would cry alone in the toilet whenever i self harmed, so i stopped cutting myself but instead i would pinch myself and dig my nails into my palm to stop myself from crying infront of people, sometimes punching my own leg. When i got to secondary school. I eventually tried to quit the bad habits because i knew how bad they were for my mental health. Eventually i did stop but i did go back once for a short period of time. I then met a few friends who were telling me to seek professional help because they(diagnosed with adhd and depression) suspected i have adhd and depression. They said how i often lack focus and have issues with maintaining consistent, often getting distracted easily, fidgeting often, being extremely careless and reckless/ impulsive and a few others which i already forgot but they kept pressuring me to seek help, even mentioning how i may have depression because i feel extremely void and empty. So do you think i need to seek professional help?
go ahead, school counsellor is free
Hi Grandberryvanillaice
Thank you for sharing your experiences and for letting us know the context and background. It takes a huge amount of courage to open up about your experiences, and it’s clear that you’ve been through a lot. Based on what you’ve described, it sounds like seeking professional help could be a beneficial step. I believe speaking to your school counsellor could help you in:
(a)Understanding Your Feelings
Feeling empty and void, especially after experiencing bullying and family challenges, can significantly impact your mental health. It’s common to struggle with self-identity and emotional regulation in such circumstances. You can safely:
-Explore Your Emotions: Understanding the root of your feelings can provide clarity and help you process your experiences.
-Identify Patterns: They can assist in recognizing patterns in your thoughts and behaviors that may contribute to your feelings of emptiness.
(b)Addressing Past Trauma
Your experiences with bullying and family dynamics are significant and can lead to long-lasting effects on your mental health. Do bring up what happened to :
-Process Trauma: Talking about your experiences in a safe environment can facilitate healing.
-Develop Coping Strategies: A counsellor can teach you healthier coping mechanisms to replace self-harm and other harmful behaviors.
(c)Exploring ADHD and Depression
Your friends’ suggestions about potential ADHD and depression are worth considering seriously. Both conditions can manifest in various ways, including:
-ADHD Symptoms: Difficulty focusing, impulsivity, restlessness, and carelessness can all be linked to ADHD.
-Depression Symptoms: Feelings of emptiness, lack of motivation, and difficulty experiencing joy are common in depression.
-A counsellor can conduct assessments to determine if you have ADHD, depression, or any other mental health conditions. This diagnosis is crucial for developing an effective treatment plan.
(d)Building a Support System
Seeking help is not just about addressing symptoms; it’s also about building a support system. A counsellor can help you:
-Strengthen Relationships: Learn how to communicate your feelings effectively with friends and family.
-Build Healthy Connections: Engage with supportive peers who understand your struggles.
Your feelings are valid, and it’s important to prioritise your mental health. Seeking professional help is a proactive step toward understanding yourself better, healing from past traumas, and developing healthier coping strategies. Remember, reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve support on this journey! 