i cant cope anymore, i swear im trying but i just cant focus. im going to fail majority of my subjects and i swear i studied, im really trying. its not my best but im really really trying. this year is such a big jump and i know js being dramatic but i really cant. i have a chem exam tmr and an english speech to give, im not prepared at all. i havent studied chem and i’ve only memorised the first para of my speech fml fml fml. i have social anxiety too, everythings clearly going great i just want to stay home and not interact with anyone, i need a social break or reset or wtv. i need a break from people and from life and from school.
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Hello there @user1016,
Thanks for coming on and sharing about your struggles - especially with the looming chem exam and speech! I can’t imagine how nerve-wrecking it is, and how it’s overwhelming your coping. Nonetheless, what you’re thinking and feeling about your situation is valid given the circumstances. 
I think it would be helpful to listen to your mind and body regarding taking a break. It’s a positive and helpful behaviour to take a step back to honour what you need at the moment (be it rest, or distance to reflect on the situation and reenergise to tackle it). At the same time, you still need to honour your commitments to others and manage your school responsibilities. Has something similar happened to you before? If yes, what did you do before that helped? I also wonder if you had a chance to speak to someone about this (perhaps your school counsellor or a trusted friend/family member) - at least to get some support?
Perhaps this is where prioritising and doing things one at a time to not stretch your concentration and energy levels, while you try to find pockets of time to rest and regulate your emotions through deep breathing and engaging in a short relaxing/calming activity - helps you to strategise what to do. I wonder what would be the easiest (by comparison) and most immediate task you can deal with? And if there’s a gap in skill/information, what do you need (and where can you get it) to close the gap? I also wonder if it’s possible to relook at the timelines for some of these tasks - like requesting for more time or reschedule to a slightly later time?
Also, I wonder about your anxiety and what’s the thoughts behind that emotion for you? As emotions serve as a messenger, is there a threat to something you value that makes you anxious; sometimes our immediate reaction is to make sudden changes or avoid the thing (to reduce the anxious feelings) before we find some clarity and respond in a way that addresses the threat… 
I hope things get better and I wish you all the best for your exam! Remember that you deserve and can get the necessary support you need. Looking forward to hearing back from you, take care! 
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honestly im not really sure. i guess i just dont want to embarrass myself or for anyone to think of me as weird. since everyone’s in a new class this year i alsofeel like its kinda hard to get close to people since they all already have other friends and its tiring trying to make sure they like me and im not unwanted. i want to be alone but at the same time i dont want to be seen as a loser. i feel like all my friendships in class are superficial, all we talk about is school , our results and our teachers.
i hate that i care so much about what other people think but i cant help it ughh. i feel so desperate to make people like me that i’ll do anything, i know its bad but i js cant say no to them.
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I know how you feel. Honestly I went through the same emotions when I was in secondary school. My friends were rather superficial initially and I could not really connect with them beyond school related stuff. best thing was that my family members started stamping that I was an introvert who disliked socialising. As a matter of fact, I was able to do well for my English oral exams in secondary school and now when I am in poly I scored As and Distinction for modules related to communication.
Personally, I feel that you should just press on by indulging in smt u like. Pursue your hobby and if you have friends outside school, spend more time with them. For my case, I wanted to show that not everyone can fit into the common stereotypes of society. I chose to focus on my studies in school and socialise with people who will better understand me (my primary school friends). In essence, try regaining yourself by embracing your personality. It maybe tough, but trust me, it’ll worth the struggle.
Hope this helps!
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Hi @user1016 it’s completely understandable to feel the pressure of wanting to fit in and be liked, especially in a new class. Remember that it’s okay to be yourself and take your time in building meaningful connections. Authentic friendships often develop gradually, and it’s okay if it takes a little while to find those deeper connections. Focus on being genuine, engaging in activities you enjoy, and let friendships evolve naturally. It’s important to prioritize your own comfort and well-being, even if it means spending some time alone. Over time, people appreciate authenticity, and those who value you for who you are will naturally come into your life. PS. I hope your chem exam and English speech went well. 
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