Hi, I’m 14 yrs old and I’ve been struggling with anxiety for a long time. I’ve been told my eq is below average and I lack common sense and is selfish. My anxiety has gotten so bad I coudn’t sleep at night, I keep thinking about what I’m doing wrong in social situations, why did this and this suddenly avoid me, am I not funny enough, am I the problem. These questions kept me up all night googling for answers. The answers state that I should just be myself and learn to be content with myself and that way I will naturally attract people to me. But what’s the point if my personality just drives people away, I tried so hard to improve but there’s so much negative reactions towards me especially during my cca. This led me to avoid the cca sessions often because I am afraid of experiencing the same pain I went through when I got bullied. I grew up with maids,didn’t do much household chores, and didn’t have much social contacts when I was younger so I lack some social skills. I often interrupt people unknowingly too… It’s not helping when my parents keep berating me for doing stupid things. I just want to stop doing stupid stuff, be able to communicate better… I just want to improve and be accepted and loved… I read so many online forums regarding the same issue and I’ve tried their methods but it never seem to work, people just find me pretentious and I look even more stupid… please help, any advice on how can I cure my anxiety?
Hi @user950 !
Firstly, thank you for sharing with us your struggles on this platform. I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way, and I want to commend you for reaching out. I want you to know that your feelings are valid, and it takes courage to seek support. I can tell that you’re facing a lot of pressure and challenges in different aspects of your life.
I want to encourage you, that anxiety and social struggles are very, very common, especially during adolescence stage. You’re still discovering who you are and how you fit into the world All of us have been through this stage too. Your desire to improve and be accepted is completely understandable
Here are a few suggestions that might help:
Seek Professional Support: Consider talking to a mental health professional, such as a therapist or school counselor as they can provide a safe space for you to explore your thoughts and feelings and offer guidance on managing anxiety.
Communication Skills: Since you mentioned struggling with social skills, you might benefit from working on communication skills - this could involve actively listening, observing social cues, and practicing empathy. A therapist can also assist you with these skills
Self-Compassion: Remember that everyone makes mistakes and goes through challenges. Be kind to yourself and recognize that personal growth takes time. Don’t be too hard on yourself!
Talk to Someone: Share your feelings with someone you trust, whether it’s a friend, teacher, or family member. Opening up about your struggles can be a great step toward receiving understanding and support. You can also brainstorm some ideas together about how to manage your feelings too.
Healthy Lifestyle: Ensure you’re taking care of your physical health. You could try regular exercise, a balanced diet, and sufficient sleep which can all contribute to better mental well-being.
I also feel it’s important to involve your parents in this process, so they can better understand your difficulties and provide extra support. If they are unaware of your struggles, do consider having an open and honest conversation with them about your feelings and your desire to work on improving yourself.
Remember, it’s okay to seek help, and you don’t have to work through these challenges alone. Do let us know how you’re doing and keep us updated, I’ll hear from you soon.