I lost my mom suddenly

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I lost my mom suddenly in oct after she had recovered from hospital just 2 days after her surgery.

She has been very close to me.
After her demise, i do not know how to deal with her passing.

Its very hard to deal with the grief.
Looking for some advice on how i can move on and tresure my mom and feel connected with her.

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Hi @gloriagowri

I’m deeply sad to hear about recent loss. Thank you for the courage in reaching out. Losing a loved one, especially suddenly, can be overwhelming. I can sense your sadness and grief. What you are going through is one of the hardest experiences. Please know you are not alone and many people want to help so reach out for support.

Here are suggestions to help you cope with your grief and stay connected to your mom:

Immediate Grief Support

  1. Allow yourself to grieve: Acknowledge your emotions, and give yourself time to process them.
  2. Seek support: Talk to family, friends, or grief informed counsellor about your feelings.
  3. Take care of yourself: Rest, eat well, exercise, and engage in relaxing activities.

Coping Mechanisms

  1. Create a memory book: Collect photos, mementos, and stories about your mom.
  2. Talk to your mom: Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with her, even if it’s just out loud.
  3. Visit special places: Go to locations that hold fond memories of your mom.
  4. Engage in her interests: Continue her hobbies or passions.
  5. Celebrate milestones: Honor your mom’s birthday, anniversary, or special dates.

Staying Connected

  1. Keep memories alive: Share stories and memories with family and friends.
  2. Create a ritual: Develop a personal ritual, like lighting a candle or visiting her grave.
  3. Sense memories: Surround yourself with her favorite scents, music, or foods.
  4. Dreams and intuition: Pay attention to dreams or intuitive feelings; they may bring comfort.
  5. Spiritual connection: Explore spiritual practices or prayer to feel connected.

Long-Term Healing

  1. Grief counselling: Consider professional help to navigate complex emotions.
  2. Support groups: Join online or in-person groups for bereaved individuals.
  3. Self-care: Prioritise physical and emotional well-being.
  4. Create new traditions: Establish new rituals and traditions to honor your mom.
  5. Find meaning: Reflect on your mom’s values and legacy; incorporate them into your life. Some books you could read are:
    -“It’s OK That You’re Not OK" by Megan Devine
    -“Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief" by David Kessler

Remember, grief is unique and non-linear. Be patient, kind, and compassionate with yourself. Please seek help soon♥️.

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