I need help, I’m going through a really bad breakup. I lost the person I used to share my whole life with. Things are really tough right now, I’m getting worse day by day. I don’t think I’ll ever be okay… Unless he comes back and i hope he comes back one day. I have no one to share how I feel. There’s no one there for me really. I’m just at my worst
Hi Jana
Thank you for your courage to seek help. What you are experiencing is truly painful and sad.
I would like to share with you that your emotions you are describing are completely understandable and the feeling of loss, aloneness and helplessness is undeniable.
I hope the following helps
a)Allow yourself to grieve and seek professional support to guide you through this. Speak with a counsellor who can help you process your emotions, listen non-judgmentally and be present with you. Feel heard and understood and allow the counsellor to partner and journey with you.
b)Self-care. Schedule time for yourself - do activities you enjoy, exercise, eat nutritious food, read and rest.
c)Journal. Write down your feelings, thoughts and reflections.
d)Be kind to yourself. Do not blame yourself unnecessarily, because this will only hurt yourself further.
e)Accept that the relationship has run its course. Reflect on the positives, and the silver lining, how it has benefited you. Slowly and gently accept that you have done all that you could which was within your control.
f)Focus on the present. Plan each day and do activities you need to, which includes those which bring you joy. Setting up a routine can help you establish some form of normalcy.
g)Widen your circle of friends and take up new hobbies involving others where you can rebuild your relationship skills.
h)Write down your accomplishments and remind yourself of your self worth, which is in your own hands.
Healing will take time, and it is important to feel your emotions. With psychological flexibility, make room for these emotions, process them and accept them. Slowly, the pain will subside. it will take time, so be gentle to yourself every day. Please take care .
I’m trying to do some of that but it really feels hard right now. Especially when I don’t really have someone to share this with. I’m starting to regret everything and I feel that the only way I’ll feel better is when he gets back. It’s hard to do anything when I cry everyday in silence. It feels like the world’s falling apart right now. I lost taste in everything, and I just miss him. I wish could just feel better again
for every year that you’ve been with him, grieve for a month.
after that, pick up the pieces and carry on living.
We’ve been together for a year, it has been 2 months since we have talked… But I’m still not okay. Is this normal that I’m feeling my lowest?
everyone experiences emotions differently. you happen to be those who feel deeply and strongly.
don’t be too bothered about what’s normal - what’s normal for one may not be normal for others.
what’s normal is feeling sad or despair when a loving relationship has ended.
i am a girl and i think im in love with an older woman. i dont know if it is just admiration but i dont think it is healthy. not to mention, she is a teacher aswell. i feel happy and comfortable around her and i know it is not healthy so i am trying to like this other guy but everytime i see her it just starts all over again
every healthy relationship requires respect and open communication.
before you decide on on your sexual orientation, focus on building a healthy relationship first.
if the person you admire/love doesn’t feel comfortable about your emotions, whether they are male or female, that relationship isn’t going to last.
I believe it’s natural to feel admiration or affection for someone you look up to (weather it’s a man or a woman). And trying to like someone else, such as the guy you mentioned, is a natural way to redirect your feelings. I think you should try to understand your feelings more, really understand how you feel towards her and why. How exactly does she make you feel? How do you feel when you’re around her?
Don’t force yourself to like another guy just because you’re in love with a woman and you can’t control it. Instead, try to control those feelings and examine them, since she is a teacher and there might be some boundaries between you both.
Remember, it’s okay to have these feelings, but it’s also important to focus on your own well-being and growth as you navigate them. You deserve to feel happy and fulfilled in your relationships, whatever form they take!
i feel nervous around her, i feel like i can talk in any way i want around her, basically, i feel comfortable when i’m with her. i sometimes get jealous whenever she’s talking to someone else. i would purposely walk the longer way to my class just to walk past the classes she teaches. i would purposely go and look for her then end up not talking to her bc i get chickened out. she’s really pretty. we’ve talked a couple times before and she is really nice and caring.
it would never work out tho, she is an adult in her 20s i think and way older than me. i am still a minor. that’s abit wrong don’t ya think?
I believe that it’s completely normal to have strong feelings for someone that you feel comfortable with, especially if she’s kind and you find her attractive. But yes, it’s important to recognize the age difference and the context of your relationship. Since you are still a minor and she is an adult, she might consider it inappropriate for a relationship to develop in that direction.
But your feelings of nervousness and jealousy show that you care about her, maybe it’s best to focus on building a friendship or admiration from a distance. Since she is a teacher, and you’re a minor, and there is a huge probability that it might not work. It’s also healthy that you appreciate and look up to someone, but it’s best to respect the boundaries (since it might not work, because she is an old woman and a teacher).
And I honestly don’t think that there’s anything wrong with having feelings towards someone from the same gender.
she’s not that old tho, but idk. do u think if i’m still interested in her by 18 do u think it’s appropriate if i dm her?
If you find that the feelings for her persist when you’re 18, reaching out could be appropriate.
But remember to approach with care and respect. If you have common interests or activities that you could engage in together (like a shared hobby or community event), that could be a natural way to begin a conversation. Remember that she might see the age difference differently, so be prepared for any outcome. She may be flattered but not interested in anything beyond friendship.
I honestly think you should focus on developing yourself right now, and if you still have feelings for her when you’re 18 you could try texting her and see how it goes!