an older sibling of mine had their behaviour changed rather suddenly and he was constantly worried about having his computer hacked by an ex employer because he believes the employer has a personal vendetta against him.
Something had happened at his previous place of employment between him and a boss. He refuses to go into detail and the examples given seems like it was not big enough to have such vendetta. He has since been unemployed for more than 1.5 years and not able to get on with life. While unemployed, he still constantly talks about his devices and wifi are not safe as they are getting hacked.
He seems to understand he is going through depression which I believe he is as well but not sure to what degree but I think it is probably a contributing factor to why he is unmotivated to find new work.
But depression alone does not seem to explain the paranoia of getting targeted by someone. He says that he needs to find out who is hacking him or things like he needs to move somewhere else, out of the country. At the start the paranoia was so bad that he would suspect family members of conspiring against him. He wouldn’t use his computer, and turn off the wifi as well. This behaviour was never prevalent in the past. and I am 99% sure it isn’t at a normal degree of worrying about being a target of hacking by an ex employer who you had a disagreement with.
Someone once tried to talk to him and mentions about the possibility of him having an induced psychosis but he doesn’t believe it and doesn’t think that these types of things would happen to him. He has tried taking medication for depression but he doesn’t believe in therapy and probably have not been fully honest with the therapist or psychologist.
I want to help him get better but I don’t know how to approach the situation and it feels like telling him that I think he might have some mental issues would just make him angrier. And also the fact he doesn’t believe in therapy is not helping.
Thank you for sharing with us the struggle that you’re experiencing, I can hear that you’re deeply concerned about your older sibling, and it’s clear that you care a great deal about their well-being. It must be challenging to witness the changes in his behavior and the impact it’s having on his life. It sounds like there are multiple layers to what he is experiencing, and it’s commendable that you want to support him.
It’s understandable that approaching this situation feels delicate, especially when your sibling is resistant to the idea of therapy. It might be helpful to express your concern from a place of care rather than framing it as a mental health issue.
You could say something like, “I’ve noticed that you’ve been going through a tough time lately, and I really care about you. I’ve observed changes in your behavior, and it seems like you’re dealing with a lot. Have you thought about talking to someone, maybe a friend or a professional, just to share what’s on your mind? It might help to have some support.”
We have a conversation tool that might also help you to prepare for this conversation - Mental Support & Wellbeing Resources in Singapore to Improve Your Mental Health | mindline.sg
Also, do avoid direct accusations or labels as it may make it more likely for your sibling to open up. You can emphasize that seeking support is a normal and healthy way to manage his challenges, and that many people actually find it beneficial. If he is still resistant, you could share your own experiences with therapy or counseling in a positive light, emphasizing the value it has brought to your life.
Remember, it’s important to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding, acknowledging his feelings and experiences. It may take time for him to be receptive to the idea of seeking help, but your continued support and encouragement can make a huge difference in his journey toward healing.
Again, I commend you for your initiative and courage. Please keep us updated on how you’ve talked to him about this and let us know how things are going. We are here to support you.