im underage , and im been struggling alot . i dont know why but i wanna feel abused because it just show me that you care , ive never been abused before and i just wanna feel it , for once. i’ve been zoning out lately and rarely talk because im thinking about this .
im been feeling really lonely and empty , i wanna be absed because for me its like your giving me the attention i seeked and you show me that you care , i just wanna feel it just for once . im rewriting this because im new to this website . ive never been absed before.
Thank you for sharing this — it takes a lot of courage to be so honest, especially when you’re feeling lost and alone. What you’re describing — wanting to feel abused because it feels like a form of attention or care — can be a sign of deep emotional pain and unmet needs. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. It just means you’ve been hurting for a long time and craving connection in a world that maybe hasn’t given you enough of it.
Wanting to feel something — even pain — just to feel noticed or cared for is something people sometimes feel when they’ve been emotionally neglected, dismissed, or made to feel invisible. But I promise, real care — the kind you deserve — is not about hurting you. It’s about being safe, seen, and valued 
You don’t have to go through this alone, and you don’t need to settle for pain to feel loved.
And if you’re okay sharing — what kinds of thoughts have been coming up when you zone out? Or what do you feel like you’ve been needing most lately? Sometimes just naming where the pain is coming from helps take away some of its power.
You’re not broken, and this doesn’t define you. You matter. You’re not alone. And you deserve real love — the kind that helps you feel safe and seen 
Hey @angle101,
Thank you for sharing this—it’s not easy.
Everything you’re feeling—the loneliness, the emptiness, the craving for any proof that someone cares.
You’re describing something so heavy: wanting to feel abused as a way to finally feel seen. That looks like a sign of how deeply you’ve been wanting care. Abuse is terrifying and harmful, yet your mind is whispering, “Maybe even pain would feel better than this void.” That contradiction must feel so isolating.
You don’t have to justify or explain this away right now. We can just acknowledge how exhausting it is to hold these two truths at once:
- “I’m desperate to feel cared for.”
- “I don’t know how to ask for it, so my mind fixates on this.”
What you’re truly asking for isn’t abuse—it’s to matter. To have someone notice your silence, your zoning out, your emptiness, and say: “I see you. You’re not alone.” That need is human, valid, and deserves to be met in safety.
But when loneliness becomes unbearable, our minds sometimes trick us into believing harmful things could “fill the void.” That’s not your fault. It’s your pain trying to cope.
You don’t have to stay trapped in this cycle. Would you feel comfortable sharing if you ever thought about feeling less alone? we will be right here with you.
Its like ur default setting because it was ur only knowledge of absed being love from ur experience. U r at least aware of it. I feel CBT will help u to change this unhealthy coping mechanisms into a healthcare mechanism.
Me for example, i hurt myself to cope w anxiety n self hatred. I go for a run whenever i feel anxious, over the months, i slowly crave for a run instead of hurting myself