Mental health crisis in the middle of my internship

Hangouts Adulting
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Im in final year of university and I am doing an internship now, along with some school modules.

I don’t really think it’s a workload issue? I just think that I have already had issues with feelings of anxiety (although I have no anxiety diagnosis I think), and being in a corporate environment is exacerbating it.

This few weeks have been terrible. I am starting to get chest pains. Went to a doctor to ask about it but I feel like the checkup was not that useful and he just sent me away with medications (for blood pressure?) and advice on how to take better care of myself.

I am 4 months into my internship and am left with a few more. I think currently, they have quite a positive impression of me but I think they have also been noticing some attitude changes? I am a lot more withdrawn and a lot less motivated. Even when I try to do some work, there are some days where I end up staring at a still screen for hours. I think my manager has noticed because he is giving me less and less work but it’s not helping. I am scared that if this continues, his impression of me will be tarnished. I don’t want to be seen as lazy because I know how much hours I stay online to get my work done but tasks that are supposed to take an hr take me like 5… I just can’t concentrate and I can’t stop thinking about all the ways I can mess my work up

My parents have been suggesting I leave the internship, especially since I am starting to get physical symptoms like being unable to breathe properly but I genuinely think this internship has treated me well and I think I am just scared that if I can’t even get to the end of this internship, how will I handle being in the workforce once I graduated? I am also scared to disappoint my coworkers, especially since they really took so much time to train me.

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Hey @wannagetbetter. Thank you for being so open about what you’re going through, it takes a lot of courage to share this, especially when you’re right in the middle of it. I really hear the fear in your words fear of disappointing people, of not finishing, and of what it might mean for your future. Being in a corporate setting for the first time can really magnify anxiety, and experiencing chest pains on top of that must feel so frightening. It’s such a heavy load to carry.

And yet, I also notice the strength behind it where you’re still showing up, still caring about your colleagues’ impression, and still trying your best even when tasks feel overwhelming. That shows responsibility and resilience, even if it doesn’t feel that way to you.

It’s natural that anxiety makes you second-guess yourself and slows things down. But the fact that your manager gave you less work may not mean he’s disappointed. Sometimes managers adjust workload because they want to ease pressure, not because they see someone as lazy. It could actually be his way of supporting you, even if it feels different from your perspective. And about your coworkers, the fact that you’re worried about disappointing them tells me how much you value and appreciate the time they’ve given you.

You’ve already proven your dedication. I mean, four months in for you internship and finishing up the remaining school modules is no small feat. Maybe finishing this internship isn’t about pushing through perfectly, but about learning how to care for yourself with kindness along the way. Sometimes, that in itself is a powerful lesson for the future.

You mentioned it doesn’t feel like a workload issue, but more about the environment. I’m curious though, what parts of the internship feel the hardest for you, and are there any moments, even small ones, where you’ve felt more at ease?

Please take gentle care of yourself as you juggle school and internship. You deserve support and understanding in this journey, okay?

Wishing you steadier days ahead, and the reminder that you don’t have to go through this alone :sunflower: