I’ve always been one of self sabotaging when I have something good for me, i hurt people around me even when theyve done nothing but be nice to me, i can’t stop lying and all i want to do is to stop it but i genuinely can’t, I’ve been taught how to lie for my whole childhood. i know im a ******* but i need help here, theres this boy i love ane he said he’ll stay but leave if i lie one more time, i dont want him to go, he’s thw only nicest thing i have going on. i know it sounds pathetic but i do only have him, could someone help me and give me suggestions? or tips, i dont mind. just please help me
What you’re describing doesn’t sound pathetic at all ya.. If this has been going on for a long time since childhood it could be more of a coping mechanism rather than a habit… You could try a few things like maybe asking yourself why you are lying in that specific moment or like what am I afraid would happen if i tell the truth now… This way you could understand the reason behind and catch yourself before it happens… You could also maybe try to pause for a few seconds before you reply to people so that you can interrupt your automatic response..
As for your boyfriend, you might want to ask his help as well since he notices when you lie… Maybe tell him to call you out on it, as you are really trying not to lie… So, it will be like he is also an ally in your effort instead of only catching your lies…
I also want to add that since these patterns have been ongoing for a long time it might be worth seeing someone for long term support… If you could reach out to us at 1771 via call or text or WhatsApp us at 6669 1771, we could help to refer you to a counsellor for long term support… You’re someone who learned to cope in ways that made sense in the past which don’t anymore, and the effort that you are putting in to make changes is what counts… Take care and please do reach out to us…