Recently, I got back my uni test results which weren’t the greatest. I did super well for two subjects and terrible for two other subjects. The catch is that these tests were taken from home due to my university’s format.
My home is not conducive for working/studying.I had no other time constraint to complete this exam, just that it had to be completed within 24 hours. My physical health is not the best as I have been feeling more tired than usual so I can’t really go anywhere just for the purpose of studying.
I understand that on the days of my tests for two particular subjects, the weight of these factors were immense. Hence, I can safely attribute my performance to them.
the thing is that, my parents tend to blame me for not doing enough to prevent these from happening. foreseeing this, I even offered to study for 3 hours daily from my school during the study break before my major exams, which is set to happen in a month’s time. They suggested that I can go to the public library instead to study for a longer duration rather than just 3 hours in my uni.
I said that if that’s the case, I’ll study from home itself, cos that meant I can reduce travel time and study for a longer duration than any other place. They found that ‘wasn’t practical’ and keep insisting that I go to the library.
Anybody with suggestions what I can do? Honestly, I don’t want to spend time arguing with them over a petty thing. But this is just taking too much of my headspace.
I resonate with receiving bad results. In our education system we take so much tests and exams, and often times try our very best. But when that outcome isn’t what we expect, it’s such a sucky feeling. Your results don’t determine who you are or your worth. While sometimes there may be things that can be done differently, you trying your best and its outcome is not your fault.
I hear that home and parents are particularly affecting your process of preparing for these exams and studying. It sounds like there’s a lot of differences in expectations, on how to study, and what’s effortful versus helpful.
Just setting aside your parents and home situation for a moment. What do you think will be helpful for you? What does an ideal situation or the right conducive study routine look like?
Hello @lovelychange ! Feeling as if your parents don’t share your viewpoint makes it much more difficult to cope with the stress of tests, your health, and an unsupportive study atmosphere. When you put up your best effort and are nevertheless held accountable for circumstances that were not totally within your control, it may be discouraging.
To begin with, you are not defined by your performance. You demonstrated your abilities by doing well in two subjects. The other two? They don’t imply that you lack intelligence or diligence. They don’t show your potential; they show the difficulties you were facing at the moment.
Similar experiences, such as the environment and mindset of wasting time, etc., also came to my mind while studying for uni. I went for overnight study session outside, thinking that it worked for me and that I had “more time,” but, it didn’t work for me, and my results were so bad. After months of trial and error with different environments and methods, I found something that worked for me, and the results showed.
My advice would be to take the time to figure out what works for you and what doesn’t. I know sometimes it may be difficult to take rest, but if your brain is tired, you won’t be able to function either. All the best!
Actually the thing is that I have tried to create a conducive environment at home by investing in an iPad, laptop stand and etcetera. the thing is that, I feel I have done my very best to mitigate this situation. But my family members are seemingly finding it hard to accommodate to my requirements. Be it watching their social media at lower volumes, turning the TV volume down and not disturbing me excessively when I am studying seems too difficult for them.
They just tend to find it easier to shift the blame on me, that I’m not doing enough. But in reality, its just an excuse they give themselves to say that their enough. These are episodic, because the same situation happened every time I received my results in secondary school and poly, every semester.
It was only after FYP and ITP in poly, that I could safely say that my environment was the problem all the time. I did so well in the FYP and ITP, that I was asked to present in front of industry people about my project. This was because I got a solid 10 hrs/day at school.
What keeps bothering me is that, their ignorance and attitude just can’t be avoided.
Actually the post was more of a rant, rather than an appeal for suggestions cos I was gonna turn crazy keeping to much in my head.
Thank you for taking time to reply ! It means a lot!
@lovelychange, it’s clear that you’ve been juggling quite a bit lately, and I can see how these challenges would weigh heavily on you. It’s tough when your academic performance gets intertwined with external factors like an unconducive study environment and health concerns, especially when you’ve already put in so much effort to adapt. Your self-awareness and honesty in acknowledging the root causes of your test results are commendable. It’s not easy to take a step back and reflect, especially when there’s pressure to meet expectations.
I understand how frustrating it must feel to have your thoughtful solution—studying at your university for a focused period—dismissed in favor of alternatives that don’t align with your circumstances. It’s even more taxing when you’re trying to avoid unnecessary conflicts with your parents, yet their suggestions seem to add to your burden rather than ease it. Wanting to preserve your mental and emotional energy while preparing for your major exams is completely valid. Striking a balance between asserting your needs and maintaining harmony at home can be incredibly challenging, especially when both sides have different perspectives.
Perhaps you could find a middle ground that aligns better with your current needs. For example, you might try combining short study sessions at a library or quiet space nearby with longer sessions at home, ensuring your health and energy levels don’t take a further hit. Sharing a bit more about how the library option impacts your overall efficiency and well-being might help your parents see your perspective more clearly. Remember, it’s okay to advocate for what works best for you—this is your journey, and you’re the one putting in the effort every day. Be kind to yourself, and trust that your determination will carry you through this phase.
I hear you, and it sounds like you have taken a lot of steps to try to make home a productive space but there’s not a lot of give and take from your family. I hope being able to rant and share helps express your frustrations! Keep doing what you need to do to take care of you, am glad that you’ve used this space to rant and let it out @lovelychange
Hey there,
First off, congrats on your good grades for the two subjects! University definately isnt an easy feat. I resonate with your concerns about an uncondusive home environment. I too find that it is hard to concentrate at home.
Studies have actually found that studying can be more effective if you study at novel locations, for a shorter period of time. Perhaps you can try slotting in more short study sessions in between your classes at university? That way, you can study at school instead of home. Perhaps you can also try studying at places other than the library! With all the stress you must be facing from university, please do remember to care for yourself! Take breaks, and keep yourself healthy. Remember, academic performance does not define you. You are so much more than your grades!
