Six years ago, I started working. Ever since I started work, I feel stressed most of the time at work. I feel like giddy, dizzy and sometimes I felt that my heart is pounding. After work, I felt okay. All those happened during working. I have to work for six years since I was being sponsored by my company during diploma school back in 2015. Some of the days, at work, even I am doing fine, seeing my colleague are busy, made me stressed. I have tried to calm myself down. At work, I felt like I am not breathing enough when it gets busy. My six years bond was almost finishing this 2024 end of May. And my boss offered me for advanced diploma to study further and will be bonded for another two years till 2027. Well, after I study for advanced diploma, I will be more stressed than now because my skills are upgraded and I have seen how my seniors work in a stressful environment. Therefore, at first I want to quit and change new job. I told my boss that I don’t want to study. However, I met a Fri who just finished advanced diploma, I find it that she learnt a lot and I want to develop my knowledge and skills as well. So here is the thing, my heart wants me to quit the job and find less stressful job but my head says I should go study. So I have decided to follow my head instead of heart. I further study and now I am doing it. Often, I wondered what if I cannot cope with the stress that I will be experiencing later on . I have been diagnosed with hyperthyroidism 1 year ago and now I am taking meds. What if the stress worsen my health? I have been thought through all these. And I said it myself that it’s ok I will go through this period.
Now I am confused and felt regretted for studying. but since I have already agreed to take sponsorship, I can’t break the bond right now. If I break the bond, I will have to compensate the amount which is about 50K plus which I cannot afford. I know the only thing is to move forward and finish the 2 years bond.
I have been practising all kinds of anxiety relieving strategy. But I felt like my anxiety level is not reduced. Do you think I should go and see a doctor for some kind of meds. Please kindly help.
Hi @Potato16
I am so sorry to hear about what you have been going through. It must have been difficult for you over the past years to be feeling stressed and anxious at work. I am wondering what is causing all these to you that is causing you to be physically affected as well. Is it too much work, expectations at work, comparing yourself with others or other reasons? For stress-related concerns, it is usually helpful to find out the root cause of the issue so you can be supported in the most appropriate way.
I hear that you have taken on the offer, and you are somewhat feeling doubtful whether it is the right decision. It is very courageous and resilient of you though, as you identified that you still want to move forward and finish your studies. That is a goal you have set and I believe you made that decision with your best interests at heart. This seemed to be something you really want, it could be a lack of confidence in what lies ahead as you manage your studies with work and the possibility of having heavier workload after graduation. Regarding the future, it may be good to have a discussion with your boss after you graduate about the expectations of the work responsibilities and for you to be really honest so you both can set realistic expectations and work goals.
As for now, you may consider the following options in helping to cope with your anxiety:
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Self-compassion: Be kind and compassionate toward yourself. While you might feel in trying to keep up with the pace and pushing yourself, I hope you try to show some compassion and understanding towards yourself. You have a lot of strengths and I believe there is a reason why you were offered the advanced education opportunity. There may be qualities people see in you that you cannot see for yourself. Do affirm yourself more and focus more on your strengths.
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Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be helpful to process and release emotions. Track your reactions when you feel stressed or anxious, so you can identify what was going on at that time (your thoughts and emotions). Writing these down could help allow you to reflect on them more deeply. This can possibly help you gain insight or new perspectives to the situation. You don’t have to share this with anyone; it’s for your own self-reflection.
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Challenge negative thoughts: Identify what are some thoughts that pull you down and make you feel bad about yourself. Think about whether these thoughts are real or are you being too critical of yourself. Challenge yourself to find alternate perspectives around this situation if possible.
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Practice self-care: Take time to reflect on what is happening around you and what you can do to take care of yourself better. It can be mental and physical actions where you eat/sleep well, engaging in hobbies you enjoy or being good to yourself because you deserve to be treated well.
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Seek support: Do reach out to trusted family or friends to talk about how you are feeling. Talking through experiences helps to gain new perspectives and insights. It could be encouraging as well.
If you are thinking about seeking professional support, you may consider community services or polyclinics referrals. Here are some community platforms you can consider:
Limitless : Talk To Someone - Limitless 6
CPH chat : https://www.cphonlinecounselling.sg/hc/en-us 2
IMH CHAT : Home - CHAT 2
ec2.sg : https://fycs.org/ec2-sg
If you do see a doctor or other medical professional, it might be helpful to let them know that you are currently on medication as well so they are mindful about the medicine that may be prescribed. It might also be helpful to explore other avenues of support too like counselling before starting on medications.
Hope this has been helpful for you. Do take care!
Thanks for taking time to reply my concern. Actually, I am a healthcare working working in ICU. Since it’s ICU, most of the time is patients’s life and death. During my time, patient can deteriorate such as collapse, cardiac arrest or doing resuscitation. However, it is not everyday kind. What I scared most was all these deterioration may happene during my time and that make me stressed. It’s not that I don’t know how to respond. I was well trained in terms of skills and knowledge. But I always have this kind of mentality what if he collapse and overthink of the consequences. I know that these are the things that I cannot control. When I talked to my friend, she said it’s my workplace is bound to be happened to be like this because it’s ICU. Yes I do agree. But I don’t seem to be managing well in terms of stress.
The reason why I want to study is because I want to gain more knowledge and skills and upgrade myslef. But sometimes I feel that the fear is stopping me from moving forward. Sometimes when I am stressed, I have palpitation, lack of sleep, chest tightness. So I am worried that what if my health deteriorate if I continue working. I am really don’t know what I want to control my anxiety.
Hi @Potato16
Thanks for sharing more details with us. It sounds like your job is mentally stressful since critical incidents can happen anytime. I hope in this stressful environment, you have a supportive team who can be there if you need help. I hear how concerned you are if there are times when you are unsure of how to respond; I am wondering during such times, are you able to rely on your teammates for support?
It is helpful to want to be trained and experienced so you can help people. It also helps to know that we cannot be good all the time or in every aspect, thus it requires a team to make things work. Trying to do things all on your own could possibly be adding more stress to you, and perhaps might hinder your work as well. You may consider a plan B by identifying your limits (when to ask for help) and knowing who you can go to for support.
I hope this is helpful!