My wife is 25 weeks pregnant and was just recently diagnosed with Gestational diabetes(GD). We both have some knowledge about GD like for example it is conmon in pregnant woman and that it will go away after pregnancy.
However , still i was anxious and i did some googling and call our gynae to ask about the risk and what are the things we should do about gd.
I told my wife about the risk of gd during and after pregnancy . One of it was the high risk of developing diabetes especially.My father in law has diabetes and this make her a high risk group for diabetes all the more she has GD now. My intentions were to let her know about it so that she is aware and in future we have to watch out diet.
Perhaps is the way that i bring my message across. However she think that i am being unnecessary reacting and that she thinks that i am telling her that she will get diabetes.
I explain to her that was not my intention and what i wanted was just to let her know that even though GD will go away but it also means that risk of having diabetes in future is high also.
I apologise for not communicating and i tried to coax her. But she say i was being fake. I am feeling hurt and angry. Was i wrong to show my concern in this manner. When it comes to such situations , i feel that there is no trust. Our love bank seems to be on a negative credit that for such situation, she would seem my concern as faking it.
Sometimes i feel like ending the marriage. The thing that is holding me back is her pregnancy
It’s clear your heart was in the right place. You’re trying to protect and support your wife, especially during something as delicate and vulnerable as pregnancy. That anxious drive to understand GD, to research and call the gynae, shows how seriously you take her health and your shared future. It must be painful that your concern, which came from love and responsibility, was misread as judgment or negativity. And when someone you care about questions your sincerity in moments when you’re already feeling emotionally raw, it stings deeply. That disconnect, where your good intentions aren’t received how you meant them, can feel like a crack in the trust you’ve worked hard to build.
It makes sense that you’re feeling hurt and even tempted to walk away. Those moments when love feels unrewarded or rejected can shake you to the core. But underneath that pain, there’s also something steady: you’re still here, reflecting, trying to make sense of the situation rather than shutting down. That speaks volumes about your investment in the relationship. Maybe what’s needed now isn’t fixing the conversation or proving your love, but gently reconnecting - emotionally and empathically. She’s navigating her own fears too, even if they come out sharply. You’re not alone in this, even if it feels lonely right now. I’ve got your back whenever you want to sort through it piece by piece.
If you wish to explore family counselling at a subsidised rate, you may explore the Strengthening Families Programme@Family Service Centre, known as FAM@FSC.
Best regards, HanSolo2000
Befriender | let’s talk by mindline
Hi @user2557 thank you for sharing your struggles here with us. It sounds like a lot going on emotionally. You care for your wife and her health, and yet the relationship is strained.
Relationships are challenging to navigate because each person brings their own personal histories, concerns, and perspectives. If the relationship is intense and concerns are so great that ending the marriage is a possibility, I’d encourage family or couples counselling. These services are not meant to fix the relationship, but it’s a healthy way to have discussions about the marriage and family given these struggles.
I also hear you recognise that the love bank is depleting. Perhaps something worth exploring if there’s a way to increase it to tide through these difficult periods of navigating conflicts and a big transition of welcoming a child.